BS: Do the Care Bears really care? To Thread - Forum Home

The Mudcat Café TM
https://mudcat.org/thread.cfm?threadid=111903
64 messages

BS: Do the Care Bears really care?

09 Jun 08 - 02:59 PM (#2361649)
Subject: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Little Hawk

Or are they faking it?

Have generations of innocent young minds been led astray by these cynical stuffed bruins, and what are they really in it for? These are the questions that must be answered if we are to rest easy in our beds at night and be able to bring up our kids right in suburban and small town America!


09 Jun 08 - 03:02 PM (#2361653)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: beardedbruce

And more importantly, should WE care about Care Bears?


09 Jun 08 - 03:13 PM (#2361655)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Peace

WTF are the Care Bears?


09 Jun 08 - 03:14 PM (#2361657)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: GUEST,Volgadon

They are cleverly subversive, out to destroy every moral fibre of society, plus, they use chords and harmonise.....


09 Jun 08 - 03:14 PM (#2361658)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: MMario

generations? I don't think so.

And most kids realize pretty soon the CB's are in it for the money.


09 Jun 08 - 03:16 PM (#2361660)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: beardedbruce

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Care_Bears


09 Jun 08 - 03:17 PM (#2361662)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: frogprince

Let's face it, they're just in it for the corporate profits; them, Barney, those blasted gay tellatubies, Curious George, all of 'em. Your Granny will probably try to tell you that things were different once; that Winnie the Pooh was totally sincere. Yeah, sure...


09 Jun 08 - 03:19 PM (#2361664)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Peace

Did they ever smoke weed?


09 Jun 08 - 03:19 PM (#2361665)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: beardedbruce

The ten original Care Bears consisted of Bedtime Bear, Birthday Bear, Cheer Bear, Friend Bear, Funshine Bear, Good Luck Bear, Grumpy Bear, Love-A-Lot Bear, Tenderheart Bear and Wish Bear. Later on, additional bears joined them, as well as the Cousins.


09 Jun 08 - 03:20 PM (#2361668)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Peace

Sounds like an episode of "The Waltons".


09 Jun 08 - 03:24 PM (#2361673)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: jacqui.c

No Peace, there wasn't a Goodnight Bear.


09 Jun 08 - 03:26 PM (#2361676)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: gnu

Smoke weed? A Large omnivore with the munchies? Sounds ominous.


09 Jun 08 - 04:07 PM (#2361713)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Wesley S

Isn't one of the Care Bears purple? Does that make him or her a Gay Bear?


09 Jun 08 - 04:20 PM (#2361720)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: PoppaGator

They don't give a shit and neither do I.


09 Jun 08 - 04:26 PM (#2361724)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Peace

Goodnight, PoppaGator.





























LOLOL


09 Jun 08 - 04:30 PM (#2361727)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: GUEST,Volgadon

No, not Curious George, I refuse to believe that!!!!!!


09 Jun 08 - 04:34 PM (#2361731)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Care Bears care about as much as crack dealers do.

Of course, I suppose that if a bunch of crack dealers were made to look cute and were backed up with zillions of marketing dollars, there'd be a few million children who would believe they care.

"Care Crack Dealers." Has a nice ring, doesn't it?


09 Jun 08 - 05:11 PM (#2361765)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Liz the Squeak

Don't care bear.

LTS


09 Jun 08 - 05:30 PM (#2361781)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Little Hawk

Ha! Just as I suspected, the Care Bears do NOT have our children's welfare in mind. Thanks, people, for giving this expose the seriousness and attention that it deserves.


09 Jun 08 - 05:36 PM (#2361793)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: PoppaGator

Winnie-the-Pooh was once sincere, when he appeared only in those four little books by A.A. Milne. Since he's become an animated Disney character, I have my doubts about him.

Same for Curious George, the nicest guy you'd ever ewant to meet through three or four decades in illustrated children's books, but now a bit less reliably innocent since making that movies-and-TV deal.


09 Jun 08 - 05:40 PM (#2361802)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Little Hawk

Got that right, Poppa Gator. The original Winnie-the-Pooh was entirely sincere, as were his erstwhile companions. Those books were wonderful.


09 Jun 08 - 05:45 PM (#2361808)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Peace

Next we're gonna find out that the Teletubbies didn't care, either. Or Barney.















Death! Where is thy sting?


09 Jun 08 - 05:49 PM (#2361812)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Little Hawk

I think Barney is high on something all the time, but on what I'm not sure.

As for the Teletubbies...they are just as bad as it gets. They must be an alien plot of some kind to destroy all sentient life on Earth, that's what I'm thinking.


09 Jun 08 - 06:22 PM (#2361840)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: heric

Only Tinky Winky is gay (not that there's anything wrong with that.) And all of them smoke the best weed all the time.


09 Jun 08 - 08:35 PM (#2361939)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Rapparee

Teletubbies, Care Bears, Smurfs, Barney and all the rest are actually illegal space aliens who are preparing our children to be fodder for their Indescribably Awful Brain-sucking Interstellar Masters.


09 Jun 08 - 08:37 PM (#2361942)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Peace

OK . . . . But, having watched a few bills debated in Canada's House of Commons, IMO the aliens are already here and they have done just that to many of our Members of Parliament.


09 Jun 08 - 09:28 PM (#2361969)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Rapparee

Yeah, they've gotten to our Congress too.


09 Jun 08 - 09:39 PM (#2361975)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Rapparee

Why don't we send the Care Bears to the Middle East? I'll bet they could solve the problems there in no time!





















And if they don't, well, we'd be rid of them.


10 Jun 08 - 01:05 AM (#2362042)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Escapee

Does a Care Bear give a shit in the woods?


10 Jun 08 - 03:28 AM (#2362078)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: JennieG

If he/she does, does anyone care?

Cheers
JennieG


10 Jun 08 - 03:51 AM (#2362088)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: GUEST,Volgadon

There were movies? I'm sure the man in the yellow hat put him up to it, he's a very shady character.


10 Jun 08 - 04:13 AM (#2362096)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Micca

I will NEVER forgive Disney for what they've done to the Winnie the Pooh characters They (SHUDDER) have Eeyore SMILING!!!!!!!


10 Jun 08 - 04:28 AM (#2362105)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: GUEST,Volgadon

If the Disney Wiinie the Pooh leaves you jaded, take a look at this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EuBzKV6XgvA


10 Jun 08 - 06:23 AM (#2362145)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: *Laura*

I agree Micca - I think it's almost CRIMINAL! My dad used to read me winnie the pooh when I was little, and not so little, with all the voices and everything - and loads of kids now only know him as a fat stupid idiot with a stupid voice!! I HATE IT!!!

phew... ok.

Yeh I always thought the teletubbies were on laughing gas or something.

Care Bears? I never remember them on greetings cards. Only as toys and tv progs and big plastic money boxes in supermarkets, so no - I don't think they care.


10 Jun 08 - 08:20 AM (#2362202)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: beardedbruce

Do we need a thread on IABSIM ( Indescribably Awful Brain-sucking Interstellar Masters )?


As in , IABSIM makes the heart grow fonder?


10 Jun 08 - 09:49 AM (#2362252)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: GUEST,LTS pretending to work

I always thought that was the 'Look at the Awful, Braindead Idiotic Animals' but they may have changed their acronym.

LTS


10 Jun 08 - 09:50 AM (#2362253)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Becca72

Care Bears will sell their mothers for a dime bag.

Now, Strawberry Shortcake and her pals (Blueberry Muffin, Huckleberry Pie, Apple Dumplin', etc) THEY care, man.


10 Jun 08 - 06:24 PM (#2362690)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Rapparee

Yeah, well, they also work for a guy who drives a custom Continental and make up part of his stable.


10 Jun 08 - 06:28 PM (#2362695)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Little Hawk

I heard that Care Bears have been hired by the Bush administration to serve as interrogators at Guantanamo and other such facilities. They will stop at nothing. They are capable of anything.


10 Jun 08 - 09:47 PM (#2362847)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Rapparee

And don't get me started on Raggedy Ann and Andy or Sunbonnet Sue and HER "friend." Let's just say that they're not all that "wholesome."


11 Jun 08 - 04:44 AM (#2363008)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: JennieG

And let's not forget Holly Hobbie who always looked as though butter wouldn't melt in her mouth......but we know better don't we!

Cheers
JennieG


11 Jun 08 - 06:24 AM (#2363050)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: John Hardly

Ursus americanus
Ursus arctos
Ursus maritimus
Selenarctos thibetanus
Melursus ursinus
Tremarctos ornatus
Ursus malayanus
Ailuropoda melanoleuca
Ursus compassionus


11 Jun 08 - 08:14 AM (#2363098)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Polite Guest

From Little Hawk:

"I heard that Care Bears have been hired by the Bush administration to serve as interrogators at Guantanamo and other such facilities. They will stop at nothing. They are capable of anything."


Uh Oh!


11 Jun 08 - 12:50 PM (#2363344)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Little Hawk

WHOA!!!!!!!!! Terrifying!


11 Jun 08 - 01:53 PM (#2363406)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: PoppaGator

Know who really doesn't care?

Hello Kitty.

Of course, it's not her fault; it's just absolutely characteristic of her species.


11 Jun 08 - 02:15 PM (#2363433)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Def Shepard

keep repeating to yourself, "they're simply toys and animated films, they're not real." :-D


11 Jun 08 - 02:19 PM (#2363435)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: beardedbruce

Does that work with politicians, too?


11 Jun 08 - 03:21 PM (#2363502)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Little Hawk

Oh, wouldn't that be great!


11 Jun 08 - 03:26 PM (#2363509)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: beardedbruce

"there's no place like home. (tap)

there's no place like home. (tap)

there's no place like home. (tap)"


Nope- I'm still here.


11 Jun 08 - 03:28 PM (#2363510)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Micca

I think ClareBear does!!!


11 Jun 08 - 03:29 PM (#2363512)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: beardedbruce

Ah, but ClareBear is not a CareBear- she is real!

Lots less scary, too.


11 Jun 08 - 05:35 PM (#2363680)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Micca

Except when dressed as a dragon!!!


11 Jun 08 - 10:46 PM (#2363890)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Rapparee

What really frightens me are Muskrat Susie and Muskrat Sam.


12 Jun 08 - 04:06 AM (#2363991)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: JennieG

How about Sunbonnet Sue and Overall Sam? Cute ain't the word......

Cheers
JennieG


12 Jun 08 - 11:29 AM (#2364251)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Becca72

what about those Precious Moments brats? You just can't trust someone whose eyes make up more than 1/2 their face.


12 Jun 08 - 06:15 PM (#2364605)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Rapparee

Or that couple from "Love Is".


12 Jun 08 - 06:56 PM (#2364632)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Rapparee

Ever seen the quilt "The Death Of Sunbonnet Sue"? I haven't been able to find a picture of it, but it's real and shows SS meeting her demise in various ways -- being stabbed, shot, hung, etc.


12 Jun 08 - 09:01 PM (#2364701)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Yeah, the Care Bears may not really give a damn, My Little Pony may get horsehit all over your rug, Strawberry Shortcake may really be a hooker in disguise, but for PURE EVIL nothing can hold a candle to Tickle Me Elmo!


12 Jun 08 - 09:42 PM (#2364716)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Rapparee

You can say THAT again, Bee-Dub!


12 Jun 08 - 10:37 PM (#2364741)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Donuel

They are made in China with traces of lead, formaldihyde and the poison they found in dog food and toothpaste.

My ruling is that they don't care about anything but quick profits.


12 Jun 08 - 10:52 PM (#2364746)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Bullshit, Don! The "Made in China" thing is just a ruse to hide their true source. And the lead, formaldihyde and other poisons are red herrings to hide the really bad stuff that's underneath.

The truth of the matter is that Care Bears are agents from an alien civilization centered somewhere near Rigel. They were really made by semisentiate Rigelian slime molds. Each Care Bear broadcasts a coded message that can only be picked up by the ears of the very young. This message encourages young humans to talk incessantly on cell phones, spend their allowances on piercings and tattoos, waste several hours of each day looking at each other's MySpace pages, and expose their underwear to public view.


13 Jun 08 - 08:01 AM (#2364915)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: GUEST

Swear Bears would be much more useful. I envisage them as cuddly pastel-coloured beasts floating about on little clouds until they detect a discontented human beneath them. They would cause the cloud to descend, disembark, ease the human's distress by uttering foul oaths until the surrounding air turns blue, and then climb back onto the cloud and continue cruising.

In fact I tried to introduce this idea into the Lewes Arms pantomime a few years ago, but was overruled on the grounds of insufficient stage space.

Valmai (Lewes)


13 Jun 08 - 09:01 AM (#2364957)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Rapparee

Nair Bears, their naked furless bodies glistening with a light coat of oil under the Klieg lights....


13 Jun 08 - 12:41 PM (#2365159)
Subject: RE: BS: Do the Care Bears really care?
From: Little Hawk

OY! What a creepy thought!