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BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners

Rustic Rebel 24 Jan 02 - 02:38 AM
katlaughing 24 Jan 02 - 03:25 AM
jup 24 Jan 02 - 03:59 AM
The_one_and_only_Dai 24 Jan 02 - 04:15 AM
sian, west wales 24 Jan 02 - 04:23 AM
Ebbie 24 Jan 02 - 04:25 AM
Jerry Rasmussen 24 Jan 02 - 04:33 AM
GUEST,MC Fat 24 Jan 02 - 04:40 AM
SeanM 24 Jan 02 - 04:40 AM
Cllr 24 Jan 02 - 04:56 AM
GUEST,swirlygirl 24 Jan 02 - 08:52 AM
Mrrzy 24 Jan 02 - 08:56 AM
GUEST,Lyndi-Loo 24 Jan 02 - 09:12 AM
GUEST,Lyndi-loo 24 Jan 02 - 09:14 AM
GUEST,Russ 24 Jan 02 - 09:14 AM
KingBrilliant 24 Jan 02 - 09:35 AM
Murph10566 24 Jan 02 - 09:38 AM
Bat Goddess 24 Jan 02 - 09:40 AM
Kim C 24 Jan 02 - 10:15 AM
JedMarum 24 Jan 02 - 10:20 AM
GUEST,swirlygirl 24 Jan 02 - 10:32 AM
Jerry Rasmussen 24 Jan 02 - 11:17 AM
Jerry Rasmussen 24 Jan 02 - 11:18 AM
Dave Wynn 24 Jan 02 - 11:25 AM
Midchuck 24 Jan 02 - 11:28 AM
GUEST,bbc at work 24 Jan 02 - 11:38 AM
Pooby 24 Jan 02 - 11:52 AM
GUEST,Les/ Manchester uk 24 Jan 02 - 12:21 PM
catspaw49 24 Jan 02 - 12:33 PM
The Walrus at work 24 Jan 02 - 12:35 PM
kendall 24 Jan 02 - 12:39 PM
catspaw49 24 Jan 02 - 12:43 PM
Lyrical Lady 24 Jan 02 - 12:47 PM
The Walrus at work 24 Jan 02 - 12:50 PM
Bill D 24 Jan 02 - 12:57 PM
GUEST 24 Jan 02 - 01:04 PM
Bill D 24 Jan 02 - 01:11 PM
Mary in Kentucky 24 Jan 02 - 01:14 PM
Mickey191 24 Jan 02 - 01:18 PM
Bobert 24 Jan 02 - 01:21 PM
GUEST 24 Jan 02 - 01:21 PM
Clinton Hammond 24 Jan 02 - 01:22 PM
Bobert 24 Jan 02 - 01:22 PM
Mickey191 24 Jan 02 - 01:22 PM
Kim C 24 Jan 02 - 02:08 PM
catspaw49 24 Jan 02 - 02:16 PM
kendall 24 Jan 02 - 02:59 PM
Rustic Rebel 24 Jan 02 - 03:16 PM
Kenny B (inactive) 24 Jan 02 - 03:59 PM
GUEST,Irish Sergeant 24 Jan 02 - 04:05 PM
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Subject: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 02:38 AM

I was asked the other day what my favorite saying was-Most often I use... "I have a hundred year life plan ahead of me" Another favorite- " Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice. Pull down your pants, and slide on the ice!" Another from Tom Robbins (came to mind on the depression thread) "Depression is a form of self-pity, and self-pity is a form of taking life too seriously." One more- from Jostein Gaarder, "If our brain was simple enough to understand it,we would be so stupid we wouldn't be able to understand it after all." Anyone else have any?? Rustic


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: katlaughing
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 03:25 AM

There is so much bad in the best of us
And so much good in the worst of us
That it hardly behooves any of us
To talk about the rest of us!

This from Ruth Gordon: "If you didn't know how old you were, how old would you be?"


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: jup
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 03:59 AM

The older I get the better I was! About as popular as a turd in a swimming pool! Thats two. Jup.


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: The_one_and_only_Dai
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 04:15 AM

Life is like a meat pie. However hard you bake it, there's always a crust on the outside...


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: sian, west wales
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 04:23 AM

Heard on BBC Wales this week: If you can't be kind, be vague.

And from my mother:

You never know when you go to sit,
Where the man in the balconey's gonna spit.

sian, west wales


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Ebbie
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 04:25 AM

Frankly, I think that self pity is better than none at all.

:)

Eb


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 04:33 AM

My favorite? "You're only young once, but you can be immature forever."
Jerry


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: GUEST,MC Fat
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 04:40 AM

I have various sayings all of them stupid but various people have picked up on them and have started saying them. When someone sings a brill song I have a habit of saying 'Double-fantastic. A drink on a stick !!' I have a mate who comes out with things like 'Hows your belly for spots ?' and 'How's your mother off for washing powder ?'


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: SeanM
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 04:40 AM

Early to rise and early to bed
Makes a man Healthy, but socially dead

And another favorite,
If you can't set a good example, you'll just have to be a horrible warning.

M


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Cllr
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 04:56 AM

"Oh bother" said Pooh, as he stuffed Piglet's lifless body into the dustbin.Cllr


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: GUEST,swirlygirl
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 08:52 AM

"Girl's you've got to know when it's time to turn the page, when you're only wet because of the rain..."

:)

xxx


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Mrrzy
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 08:56 AM

Wasn't it (fill in forgotten actor's name, she was in 9 to 5 and wasn't dolly parton, she was in lots of things, I know who it is!! Where O where is my brain today?) who said I always wanted to be somebody... guess I should have been more specific!


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: GUEST,Lyndi-Loo
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 09:12 AM

I wouldn't want to join a club that would have me as a member
Grouch Marks
She thinks her piss is whisky (about a vain person)
My mother - God bless her


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: GUEST,Lyndi-loo
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 09:14 AM

Sorry, I think I've just developed dyslexia. That should be Groucho Marx


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: GUEST,Russ
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 09:14 AM

No matter where you go, there you are. (Buckaroo Banzai)


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: KingBrilliant
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 09:35 AM

Mrrzy - was it Lily Tomlin? That's the other actress I remember from 9 to 5. But there was another one?
It was a long time ago I watched that...
Kris


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Murph10566
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 09:38 AM

To Mrrzy - Either Lily Tomlin or Jane Fonda ?

One of my favorites is by Ben Franklin:

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."

Happy Murph


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 09:40 AM

"Be yourself -- everyone else is taken."

"All that glitters may not be gold, but at least it contains free electrons."

Linn


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Kim C
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 10:15 AM

One day Mister burst forth with this little gem: Sometimes ya pokes the cow, and sometimes the cow pokes you. Another one he likes to say, that he didn't make up, is: A bear sleeps in a bear skin, I suppose; I slept in my bare skin and damn near froze.

A faithful heart makes wishes come true. - from Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon

It's a fool that looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart. - from O Brother

Badger me not with details. - from A Knight's Tale

Serenity NOW! - from Seinfeld

Anything John Prine ever wrote.

I think he said, the sheriff is near. - from... well, y'all know where it's from. :-)


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: JedMarum
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 10:20 AM

these are great!


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: GUEST,swirlygirl
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 10:32 AM

Some days you have to accept that you're the statue and other days you're the pigeon...

:)

xxx


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 11:17 AM

Mark Knopfler sang, "sometimes you're the windshield, sometimes you're the bug."
And, apropos to the emotions that are running high around here among some people, someone said (perhaps it was even me, although I don't want to take credit for it,)"You get the life you receive." I liked the way that Kendal said it better, though.
Jerry


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 11:18 AM

I know I should read things before I post them... the line is, "You get the life you PERcieve." Please be kind...
Jerry


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Dave Wynn
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 11:25 AM

"The harder I worked the luckier I got"...Norman Wisdom


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Midchuck
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 11:28 AM

Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgment.

You get what you pay for. (Not by any means strictly true in all cases, but worth considering when something seems like a really good deal.)

Afore I was desperate enuff to use your brains, I'd use my own! (Pogo, of course. The second saddest thing about growing older is that fewer and fewer people remember Pogo.)

Peter.


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: GUEST,bbc at work
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 11:38 AM

From my mom in Missouri: It wouldn't be noticed on a galloping horse.

Upgrade from my fantasy-loving son: It wouldn't be noticed on a *flying* horse!

bbc, keeping tradition alive in the family


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Pooby
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 11:52 AM

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read. (Groucho Marx)

When you assume, you make an ass out of U and Me. (Felix Unger)

All that is gold does not glitter. (I think it was either Samwise Gamgee or Frodo Baggins)

The drunker I sit here, the longer I get. (Anon.)

Just a sampling, mind you.

Pooby


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: GUEST,Les/ Manchester uk
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 12:21 PM

If their is one thing I would like to know, it's where I am going to die. Because If I knew, I wouldn't go there.

Once upon a time their were 2 rabbits, look how many their are now.

What has 7 eyes and cannot see? Three blind mice and half a pigs head

The dyslexic assassins of Iran would like to appologies for the death of Willie Rushton. OK. that was a joke.


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: catspaw49
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 12:33 PM

ah yes....Bumper sticker philosophy........Gotta' love it.

I have a couple that I tend use myself:

"If I laugh at any mortal thing, 'tis that I may not weep."
......George Gordon (Lord Byron)

"There is only what is; what should be never existed."
......Leonard A. Schneider, Stand-Up Philosopher (Lenny Bruce)

Spaw


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: The Walrus at work
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 12:35 PM

When a deal looks too good to be true.....It usually is !

After a particularly BAD joke (or an attempt to BS me that didn't work) I have been heard to mutter
"Yes, very good. Now sit back in your chair and we'll plug it in"

One of my Father's was
"If "If"s and "And"s were pots and pans, we'd have no need of tinkers".

Another one of Dad's that I've found myself using -
"I'm not quite as green as I'm cabbage looking"

Walrus


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: kendall
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 12:39 PM

No amount of belief can create a fact. We have met the enemy, and, he is us. (Pogo) I'm not the man I used to think I was. (not sure, maybe mine) Music hath charm to soothe the savage BREAST.(Congreve) All that GLISTERS is not gold. Shakespere) Brevity is the soul of wit. (Shakespere) I'd rather die on my feet than live on my knees.(Irish proverb?) Iron is tempered by fire, mankind by adversity. (Seneca)


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: catspaw49
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 12:43 PM

Well geez Kendall, that crap just goes to show how little Shakespeare actually knew. I think Dorothy Parker had it better with, "Brevity is the soul of lingerie."

Spaw


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Lyrical Lady
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 12:47 PM

Expect nothing and you'll never be disappointed ....(words from my mother which unfortunately ring true more times than not.)

LL


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: The Walrus at work
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 12:50 PM

That's the thing about being a pessimist, you don't get disappointed.

W


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Bill D
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 12:57 PM

I have WAY too many to consider what to choose, because the WWW and internet not only collect them, but offer you programs to insert them into your email, sign your newsgroups posts....and generally inundate you with so much cleverness by others that you may give up trying to BE clever yourself!

do you doubt me?....do a Google search on "taglines" or "signatures"

...but, my Daddy used to have a bunch:

"...next October, at 4 o'clock"
(when asked when he'd get something done) "...you do, and you'll clean it up!"....(when someone said something in a foreign language)
"...

the one I invented was "Entropy will get you, if you don't watch out!...In fact, Entropy will get you even if you DO watch out"

*thinking of 'good' ones to offer*


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 01:04 PM

You`re looking well,are you sick?.Paddy Joe.


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Bill D
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 01:11 PM

following my own advice, I searched and found:

"Certain flaws are necessary for the whole. It would seem strange if old friends lacked certain quirks." Goethe

"All religions are founded on the fear of the many and the cleverness of the few." Stendhal

"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use." Galileo Galilei

"The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball." Doug Larson

happy hunting!


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Mary in Kentucky
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 01:14 PM

bbc, my son the engineer says, "Can't see it from my house." Also, "Good enough for government work."


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Mickey191
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 01:18 PM

Two good pieces of advice. Never lick a steak knife,and never take a laxative and sleeping pill together. Slainte


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Bobert
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 01:21 PM

Ahhhhh, LET'S GET NUDE! Ol bobert's just funnin' folks.

How about your dad's advice for you after you jumped from the roof into an inflatable swimming pool and ii is obvious to everyone that what you need is an ambulance. Ahhhh, SHAKE IT OFF, KID!

Or my favorite. Ahhh, IF THE LORD LOOKS AFTER FOOLS AND KIDS THEN I GOT DOUBLE COVERAGE!...

And, lastly, froms Tweedsburg. DUCT TAPE MAKES THE WORLD GO ROUND!

the bobert


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 01:21 PM

Your looking well, are you sick?. Paddy Joe.


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Subject: My Laws... stolen as they may be
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 01:22 PM

CLINTON'S LAWS

1 Unconditional love does not mean blind acceptance of negative behaviour.
-The Carol Burnet Law of Dysfunctional Families

2 It's not half full. It's not half empty. It's on its way to being topped up!

3 Forget milk!!! Guinness was made for moustaches.

4 "It'll either sound good, or it'll suck..."
-The Fence-Sitters Creed-

5 When in doubt, Alpha strike. With the Kaufman Retrograde if necessary...
-Starfleet Battles Rule #1-

6 Don't think about it.... have some brandy... and get out of those wet clothes.
-Ian Tamblyn's Survival School

7 Never throw your weapon. It may be handed back to you.

8 The quickest way to a mans heart is a sharp upward stab between the ribs.

9 Never give a Celt an even break... Compound fractures heal slower.

10 Never eat Jolly Ranchers
-Love Phones Rule #463

11 Never be daunted in public... and if you are... go away like a cat!

12 Poetry weakens the blood.... A good roast is worth its weight in poetry and history!
-Richard The Lionheart

13 It's better to be dead and cool than alive and uncool.
-H. Davidson and M. Man

14 There's always someone in the lobby that isn't supposed to be there.
-ShadowRunners Law #356 (Mungo's Maxim)

15 Don't talk to me with your pants down!
-Sarah's Law of Bathroom-Door Conversations

16 "Shut your pee-pee hole and drink this!"
-Tozser's Answer To Everything

17 Pain is inevitable, misery is optional.
-Eco-Challenge rule #1

18 Never eat anything that moves, never drink anything you can't spell.
-Red's Laws Of Consumption

19 Bare the arm without shield
Empty the hand without sword
Bare the back without brother behind
Worthless the man without his word

20 Don't run! It makes you look like food.
-Natures First Law-


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Bobert
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 01:22 PM

Ahhhhh, LET'S GET NUDE! Ol bobert's just funnin' folks.

How about your dad's advice for you after you jumped from the roof into an inflatable swimming pool and ii is obvious to everyone that what you need is an ambulance. Ahhhh, SHAKE IT OFF, KID!

Or my favorite. Ahhh, IF THE LORD LOOKS AFTER FOOLS AND KIDS THEN I GOT DOUBLE COVERAGE!...

And, lastly, froms Tweedsburg. DUCT TAPE MAKES THE WORLD GO ROUND!

the bobert


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Mickey191
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 01:22 PM

And don't repeat yourself-it's bloody boring.


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Kim C
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 02:08 PM

I went to a seminar once where Zig Ziglar said, Money will buy you a bed but it won't buy you a good night's sleep.

There is no profit in ifs. We must go from where we stand. -- from one of the Cadfael mysteries

There's a quote by Mark Twain that I really like but I can never seem to remember it exactly. It's something like, our Creator has endowed us with three things: freedom of speech, freedom of religion, and the prudence to exercise neither.

Wasn't it Thoreau or Emerson who said to beware of enterprises that require new clothes? Although I've never lived by that one...


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: catspaw49
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 02:16 PM

Ol' Zig huh Kim? Not going to throw in his attitude/aptitude/altitude line? Geeziz, is he still alive and selling that crock of shit? Amazing.........

Spaw


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: kendall
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 02:59 PM

Dont own anything that has to be fed or painted. (Utah Phillips).

Spaw, I expect Dorothy Parker looked better in her nightie than Shakespere did in his.

Men/women are like dog turds. The older they are, the easier it is to pick them up.


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 03:16 PM

I want to thank all of you for joining this thread! My first post and I was a little reluctant to do so,but coming on today and seeing so much wonderful feedback,and insight into people,and good humor, Thanks! I love you all!! I have another addition, it's a toast I use; I drink to your health in the taverns, I drink to your health in my home. I drink to your health so many times, I've damn near ruined my own!^ Thanks all for making me feel at home. Rustic


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: Kenny B (inactive)
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 03:59 PM

For jobs around the house

"Its in year three of the rolling five year plan"

& another

"People in grass houses shouldn't stow thrones"

& finally from a well known fespian - Noel Coward?

"What I like about the theatre - the roar of the greasepaint and the smell of the crowd"
Kenny B


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Subject: RE: BS: Favorite sayings,adages,one liners
From: GUEST,Irish Sergeant
Date: 24 Jan 02 - 04:05 PM

O.K. Sportsfans here goes. Stupid people shouldn't breed. measure twice, cut once Beauty is only skin deep but ugly goes clear to the bone. "you can fool some of the people all of the time, all of the people some of the time but you can't fool all of the people all of the time" Abraham Lincoln. "MAke your descision. if you get up the next moring and you can look yourself in the mirror, you made the right one." Vernon MacMillan (my father) "All God's Chilluns got guns" Groucho Marx "You ask me why i don't drink water? Because fish %#@* in it" Attributed to William Claude Dunkenfield (W.C. Fields) You! Out of the gene pool! Have a great evening and welcome to Mudcat Rustic Rebel!


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