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BS: Light on - no one in

GUEST,Patrish 02 Mar 00 - 10:56 AM
MMario 02 Mar 00 - 11:05 AM
GUEST,Patrish 02 Mar 00 - 11:12 AM
Skipjack K8 02 Mar 00 - 11:17 AM
GUEST,Patrish 02 Mar 00 - 11:21 AM
kendall 02 Mar 00 - 11:23 AM
MMario 02 Mar 00 - 11:24 AM
GUEST,Patrish 02 Mar 00 - 11:26 AM
GUEST,Patrish 02 Mar 00 - 11:46 AM
Willie-O 02 Mar 00 - 11:50 AM
catspaw49 02 Mar 00 - 01:26 PM
jeffp 02 Mar 00 - 01:29 PM
GUEST,Penny S. (somewhere else) 02 Mar 00 - 01:37 PM
paddymac 02 Mar 00 - 02:32 PM
kendall 02 Mar 00 - 02:39 PM
TerriM 02 Mar 00 - 05:27 PM
Amos 02 Mar 00 - 05:32 PM
Mbo 02 Mar 00 - 06:01 PM
Metchosin 02 Mar 00 - 06:52 PM
Metchosin 02 Mar 00 - 06:56 PM
Banjer 02 Mar 00 - 07:25 PM
kendall 02 Mar 00 - 07:29 PM
sophocleese 02 Mar 00 - 09:04 PM
rangeroger 02 Mar 00 - 09:55 PM
Troll 02 Mar 00 - 10:11 PM
Amos 02 Mar 00 - 10:43 PM
GUEST,Penny S. (elsewhere) 03 Mar 00 - 12:56 PM
roopoo 03 Mar 00 - 01:44 PM
Liz the Squeak 03 Mar 00 - 02:19 PM
Crowhugger 03 Mar 00 - 02:28 PM
Jon Freeman 03 Mar 00 - 02:28 PM
TerriM 03 Mar 00 - 03:43 PM
MMario 03 Mar 00 - 03:51 PM
Bert 03 Mar 00 - 06:06 PM
Osmium 03 Mar 00 - 06:46 PM
Liz the Squeak 04 Mar 00 - 02:17 AM
Ritchie 04 Mar 00 - 02:42 AM
Ebbie 04 Mar 00 - 02:47 AM
roopoo 04 Mar 00 - 03:55 AM
Micca 04 Mar 00 - 07:47 AM
Liz the Squeak 06 Mar 00 - 09:04 PM
Caitrin 06 Mar 00 - 10:46 PM
Troll 06 Mar 00 - 11:09 PM
Mbo 06 Mar 00 - 11:27 PM
Sorcha 06 Mar 00 - 11:39 PM
GUEST,The Beanster 07 Mar 00 - 12:46 AM
ddw 07 Mar 00 - 01:16 AM
Quirk Malarkey 07 Mar 00 - 01:23 AM
Sabra 07 Mar 00 - 01:46 AM
Sorcha 07 Mar 00 - 01:54 AM
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Subject: Light on - no one in
From: GUEST,Patrish
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 10:56 AM

Today when I tried to start my car(very old 1972, but new to me as of yesterday), instead of using the choke I used the rear fog light. It did not work.
Does anyone one else have no power over the brain cell...........
Patrish


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: MMario
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 11:05 AM

I share a brain cell (singular) with a minimum of 27 relatives scattered through the eastern part of North America. Bandwidth is stictly limited, and there are days when the connection seems to go down completly.

does that answer your question?


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: GUEST,Patrish
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 11:12 AM

Yes indeedy......... yesterday was one of those days. I was typing a report I had hand written at home and after some time and two pages worth (Ihave to look at the keyboard)it was all in capitals I highlighted it and promptly deleted it. I could have used the undo button, that would have been sensible, but the brain cell ordered otherwise
sad
Patrish


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Skipjack K8
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 11:17 AM

Patrish

It's one of the side effects of British beef.

Delicious!

Skipjack


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: GUEST,Patrish
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 11:21 AM

Thats strange, I faintly remember someone calling me a mad cow - on several occasions
Patrish


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: kendall
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 11:23 AM

This is nothing new to me. Back in 1965 I was in Halifax, NS. Had a few beers and a local guide showing me around. She also had a few beers. We left some joint, walked down the street, entered another joint (so I thought) bumped into the bouncer, I looked up at him and asked "How many jobs do you have anyway?" Turned out to be the same joint!! That Moosehead brew will raise hell with your compass.


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: MMario
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 11:24 AM

Patrish? did they survive?


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: GUEST,Patrish
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 11:26 AM

I took it as a compliment and lavished many hugs and kisses on them
Perhaps I am a mad cow......


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: GUEST,Patrish
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 11:46 AM

I have just gone out to the car and I left the window open at lunchtime. It has been raining. I will have very wet bottom by the time I get home. (sigh)
Patrish signing off - not really looking forward to getting in the car, yuk


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Willie-O
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 11:50 AM

what the hell is a rear fog light? (I can just picture this...car designer goes 'damn, can't see to back up in this fog...') sounds like a luxury item to me even if it is a '72. Or is it a London (?) necessity?

when my attention wanders, my subconscious heads me over to the mudcat cafe...for a lattay.

W-O


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: catspaw49
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 01:26 PM

This makes me think of all those great expressions like "a few bricks shy of a load." Some even musical (and otherwise, of course):

A few sandwiches short of a picnic.
Two tones short of a chord.
A couple of bridge pins missing.

And on and on.....but I don't want to be hoggish here.

Spaw


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: jeffp
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 01:29 PM

I refer to these rare (yeah, right!) moments as "brain farts." My wife still laughs about the time I went out the patio door, shut the screen behind me and, realizing I had forgotten to bring something with me, turned around and walked right into the screen door.


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: GUEST,Penny S. (somewhere else)
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 01:37 PM

Rear Fog Lamp - brighter than normal rear red light for use in restricted visibility, such as fog (not much in London nowadays) sea mist, low cloud, heavy rain, snow or for indicating to the idiot investigating the contents of the exhaust pipe that he's too close.

Penny


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: paddymac
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 02:32 PM

Brain farts, senior moments, CRS, CRAFT: these are all terms aptly used to describe a complex symptomology generally considered to result from a serious lack of Guiness in the system. One must always replenish those precious bodily fluids.


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: kendall
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 02:39 PM

Must be rough on those folks who were not threaded all the way on to start with.


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: TerriM
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 05:27 PM

Ah, Kendall, we've met then? My senior moments are now becoming days and too many boo-boo's to admit to.... but I will tell about the time I was in a car accident and my car went in for repair for about 8 weeks. When I finally got it back, I couldn't remember how to put it into reverse for 2 days. Caused my colleagues much mirth to watch me hunt for a parking space I could both drive in and out of.Sort of ties in with my favourite expression which is'one wheel in the sand'.


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Amos
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 05:32 PM

I can definitely relate to that...sometimes my whole life seems to be one wheel in the sand, and I wasn't even heading for the beach!


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Mbo
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 06:01 PM

It seems that way for all of us sometimes, Amos. As for going stunod/ lights are on, no one's in/a few coupons short of a toast rack/ check out my last song on the Song Challenge! No. 12. Talkabout Mega-stunod!

--Mbo


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Metchosin
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 06:52 PM

In our household it is referred to as "rode in on the short bus today"...not very PC but I have just finished reading Amos's honesty thread.

In this state, I have bounced my face off pedestrian crossing signal boxes, mistaken road signs, such as "Xing", for foreign languages, lit pencils and have been known to peer into the fridge several times, before recalling that I was actually looking for a pen.

Fortunately, my family has come to accept my occasional bouts of single minded preoccupation and predisposition to serious brain fade.


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Metchosin
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 06:56 PM

oh yeah, and others in the household tend to suffer from "thing blindness", (looking for lost objects that are right in front of you)


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Banjer
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 07:25 PM

Even if I could remember what it was I was going to add to this thread, I don't think I would!


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: kendall
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 07:29 PM

A suggestion for Terri. Why didnt you simply check your owners manual? or ask some man to do it by telling him "It wont go into reverse."


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: sophocleese
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 09:04 PM

Neural Net Failure; the ability to put a book face down on any available horizontal surface and then spend half an hour vaguely wandering around the house looking for the book, "I just had it two minutes ago!"


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: rangeroger
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 09:55 PM

When I worked for San Diego County Probation Dept. we had a supervisor we called "51" to his face. He was quite proud of the title,never knowing it meant one card short of a full deck. rr


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Troll
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 10:11 PM

Oh yes! Our house oft resounds with the plaintive cry of "Has anyone seen my glasses(keys, cap,etc?)" A sure sign that Dad (me) has mislaid something in plain sight AGAIN!

The best one I've heard so far is "a wall short of a room" Kinda says it all.

troll


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Amos
Date: 02 Mar 00 - 10:43 PM

My defense in these things is that in letting go of the vaunted mental efficiency of my younger years, when I never misplaced a paragraph, let alone a book, I have opened my self to broader views of the universe, higher realities, tuned in to other planes...at least I hope that's what it is. I really, really, hope so...what was it ...oh...yeah...dang, where's that keyboard when you need it? Anybody seen my keyboard?


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: GUEST,Penny S. (elsewhere)
Date: 03 Mar 00 - 12:56 PM

There really is a name for that way your eyes totally miss what you're looking for, but I can't quite recall what it is. It's why looking for something else turns it up, though.

Penny


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: roopoo
Date: 03 Mar 00 - 01:44 PM

Well there's such a thing as "maternal amnesia" to get a lot of us lasses off the hook, but where does that leave everybody else? All us avid TOGS* (listen to Terry Wogan on Radio 2 monday-friday 7.30-9.30 am GMT) will be familiar with the legend on the elusive TOGS sweatshirts: "Do I come here often?" By the way, who else besides me has to put their spectacles on in order to find their spectacles if they're not in the usual place?

mouldy

*Terry's Old Gals/Geezers


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 03 Mar 00 - 02:19 PM

AAAAARRGGGH Another TOG!!! Did you put your sandwiches in the fridge and a packet of ham slices in your bag to take to work today as well?

Or got all the way home only to discover that you've left your child at the childminders.......

Definately two barrels short of a brewery.... or two chunks short of a chocolate bar.... or an asprin short of a medicine chest....

LTS


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Crowhugger
Date: 03 Mar 00 - 02:28 PM

One of my favourites is:

"A bubble off plumb."


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Jon Freeman
Date: 03 Mar 00 - 02:28 PM

I've always been bad and even as a kid have had a habbit of rusihing of to get something only to forget what it was they I wanted.

Workwise, I think by biggest blunder on this sort of thing was setting a profile lathe once. I knew this change over well and all it involved was swap of profiles trouble was one day, I forgot to put the new one in and set the machine running - it made quite a mess of the tooling.

Musically I can start one tune and somehow find my self playing another, start a tune that I don't even know/ haven't learned and can suddenly forget words to songs I know very well..

Jon


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: TerriM
Date: 03 Mar 00 - 03:43 PM

Kendall, just try and guess where I put the manual....I know I couldn't! And I was damned if I was going to ask a man and prove every blonde female stereotype in the book! I'm a huge Terry Wogan fan but found myself blushing to the roots of my hair the day he described a guy who turned up at a factory and forgot who he was supposed to be seeing. He asked the receptionist if he could see an engineer, turned out there were a 150 of them. I'd done pretty much exactly the same thing the day before.Quite frankly, it's a miracle I remember how to get home each day.


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: MMario
Date: 03 Mar 00 - 03:51 PM

I do telephone help support. Every once in a while I will totally blank as to who I am talking to, what district they are in, what the problem is; and 9 out of 10 times, I placed the call!!


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Bert
Date: 03 Mar 00 - 06:06 PM

One time I had an open circuit in an appliance cord, (In England - 240 Volts) so I unplugged it from the APPLIANCE end and took a screwdriver and.....ZAP!!!

I only did it ONCE though, my elbow still tingles just thinking about it.


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Osmium
Date: 03 Mar 00 - 06:46 PM

Old Celtic Proverb on the Subject

Excuse me how very rude
It was not me it was my food
Had it been below my heart
It would have been a bloody great fart.


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 04 Mar 00 - 02:17 AM

OK, done it again, gave the cornflakes to the cat and the child a bowl of Kitty Crunchies - the Cat thought Christmas had come early and Phoebe has always eaten cat biscuits - her teeth are strong and healthy, her nose is moist and her coat glossy. The cat just farts milky milky - if you remember that far back with Punt and Dennis - farts. Nice. The other cat is having another crisis - she forgot where her food bowl was last night and spent a good 2 hours sitting on my head/chest/lap/back and crying for food. Had to take her downstairs and show her. Definately a dog short of Battersea. I have a full 6 pack, just not the plastic thing that holds them together. I am a file short of a program and not the sharpest pin in the box. And I'm a Civil Servant with the IRS - worried?? I would be!!!!

LTS

And TerrM - what colour were those roots you blushed to, because you were a redhead last time we met!


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Ritchie
Date: 04 Mar 00 - 02:42 AM

Some times I use the car to get to work and other times the bus...it's a lovely feeling when sitting on the bus on my way home after a hard days work when 'one' realises that 'one' has travelled to work in the car and it's now parked somewhere..alone. Doh !! I manage to get out of most of my 'foo-pahs' by modelling myself on Colombo.

Mouldy,thanks, I too also as well listen to Wogan and his crew (he's much better on the radio than tv where he was over exposed which seems to be the trend when a 'new star' is discovered)and I have been afraid to ask what a TOG was.

wear the fox hat Ritchie


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Ebbie
Date: 04 Mar 00 - 02:47 AM

You make me feel so much better! One day I found a cereal box in the fridge and no milk. Went looking, found the carton wedged into the freezer shelf- tight fit too. Just where ARE those synapses firing?


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: roopoo
Date: 04 Mar 00 - 03:55 AM

I think a lot of all this forgetfulness has to do with the fact that we're all super-intelligent beings with synapses firing at full throttle, and that our minds are merely on higher things!

My latest whoopsie was about a month ago, when I went to a friend's house for a monthly lunch get together which a few of us have. One of the others turned up as I was happily burying my snout into a glass of cava, and said, 'I've just come from Anne's (childminder) and she has told me to say "meals on wheels" and to enjoy your lunch.'(Anne is also the co-ordinator for Meals on Wheels in our village). I told her don't be daft it's Tuesday and I don't do Tuesdays (it was Thursday) and anyway I'm not on this week.....am I? Oh bugger! I had done a swop on the rota and got muddled. Having done it the week before, I still thought I had a week gap before I did it again. WRONG!!! Luckily, when the kitchen rang to say that nobody had been, she had been able, albeit a bit late, to get another volunteer out. Talk about food turning to ashes. Luckily the old folks took it well. They all know me. The other volunteer was my next door neighbour who wasn't in the least surprised, having lived next to me for 12 years!

mouldy


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Micca
Date: 04 Mar 00 - 07:47 AM

Many of these are what a young friend of ours always referred to as " making a fox pox". My latest is making up Hydrogen peroxide solution, carefully pipetting distilled water into a flask then making it up with distilled water , and wondering why I was getting no oxygen with my catalyst. It took ages to spot the flaw..


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 06 Mar 00 - 09:04 PM

A TOG is The Old Geezer, a TYG is of course, The Young Geezer. A geezer is one who dressed up in strange clothes and went round demanding money with menaces, during the long dark English Winter, the origin of Trick or Treat. They went out in disguise or 'guise'. I have quite often got the bus back from town, only to find that the car is still where I left it, in town.... I've also spent ages trying to persuade a traffic warden that I had bought a ticket, when the offending ticket was in fact firmly in my purse or hand!!!

If we were any more stupid, we'd have to be watered twice a week.....

LTS


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Caitrin
Date: 06 Mar 00 - 10:46 PM

My younger brother takes great joy in relating to all our friends and family the story of the time I search for ten full minutes for my car keys. They were in my hand. I'm not the brightest crayon in the box sometimes, as my mom would say.


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Troll
Date: 06 Mar 00 - 11:09 PM

Not to worry kids. It's gonna get worse! *evil chuckle*

troll


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Mbo
Date: 06 Mar 00 - 11:27 PM

Don't talk to my sisters, or they'll let out the old "Popcorn Cheese" story again. Not one of my brightest moments. Almost comparable to the time I accidentally deleted Windows off the computer...I tell you, the word for it is STUNOD! He he, like Jeff Lynne says "I can tell by the way your drapes are hanging that there ain't nobody in there--nobody's home!"

--Mbo


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Sorcha
Date: 06 Mar 00 - 11:39 PM

I always try to punch "Send" on a cordless (not cell) phone, and I always clutch the automatic transmission, and forget to clutch the stick shift. If I had a brain, I'd be dangerous......maybe I am anyway.


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: GUEST,The Beanster
Date: 07 Mar 00 - 12:46 AM

I knew I had one roll of toilet paper left but I couldn't find it anywhere and nature was calling. Not in the cabinet, not under the sink--nowhere. I finally took a box of Kleenex in with me...a few hours later, I was making some coffee, looked in the fridge for the milk and there, neatly pushed to the back of the shelf was the toilet paper. Hellooooo?

I was at work one day about 15 years ago, working as a receptionist. Someone called and instead of answering the phone, "Good morning, Aetna Insurance," I had looked at my watch a milisecond before and cheerily said into the receiver, "10:15."

One time, I was putting out a cigarette at work and set my thumbnail ablaze. Nail polish is very flammable, it turns out.

One fry short of a Happy Meal, you might say. LOL

And Mbo, please tell us about the popcorn cheese incident!


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: ddw
Date: 07 Mar 00 - 01:16 AM

I've noticed lately it sometimes takes me three or four lost-and-founds to get through my first cup of coffee in the morning. Maybe I should go back to drinking booze before I go to bed....

david (often playing on a 420 A)


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Quirk Malarkey
Date: 07 Mar 00 - 01:23 AM

personally, i've always liked,"a couple of twinkles short of a full glitter.--doodlezak


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Sabra
Date: 07 Mar 00 - 01:46 AM

Hmm.. I thought a Geezer was jes the bass player for Black Sabbath--the knowledge of which might in itself explain my status as "Ditz-Queen" around my office....


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Subject: RE: BS: Light on - no one in
From: Sorcha
Date: 07 Mar 00 - 01:54 AM

That does it, I'm going to bed. Hope the Net is not so busy tomorrow......


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