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MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]

Rapparee 23 Nov 20 - 11:50 AM
Donuel 23 Nov 20 - 03:43 PM
Donuel 23 Nov 20 - 05:51 PM
Stilly River Sage 23 Nov 20 - 06:21 PM
Donuel 23 Nov 20 - 07:44 PM
Rapparee 23 Nov 20 - 08:49 PM
Donuel 24 Nov 20 - 07:02 PM
Rapparee 25 Nov 20 - 05:44 PM
Donuel 25 Nov 20 - 09:05 PM
Stilly River Sage 26 Nov 20 - 01:39 PM
Rapparee 26 Nov 20 - 09:47 PM
Stilly River Sage 27 Nov 20 - 12:39 PM
Rapparee 27 Nov 20 - 09:21 PM
Donuel 28 Nov 20 - 06:26 AM
Stilly River Sage 28 Nov 20 - 01:27 PM
Donuel 28 Nov 20 - 05:07 PM
Rapparee 28 Nov 20 - 09:09 PM
Donuel 29 Nov 20 - 06:33 AM
Rapparee 29 Nov 20 - 06:39 PM
Donuel 30 Nov 20 - 02:02 PM
Rapparee 30 Nov 20 - 09:12 PM
Donuel 01 Dec 20 - 07:09 AM
Rapparee 01 Dec 20 - 06:37 PM
Stilly River Sage 02 Dec 20 - 12:21 PM
Donuel 02 Dec 20 - 07:11 PM
Donuel 02 Dec 20 - 09:00 PM
Rapparee 02 Dec 20 - 09:27 PM
Stilly River Sage 03 Dec 20 - 12:32 AM
Donuel 03 Dec 20 - 05:47 AM
Rapparee 03 Dec 20 - 09:29 AM
Rapparee 03 Dec 20 - 09:33 AM
Donuel 03 Dec 20 - 12:16 PM
Donuel 04 Dec 20 - 01:58 PM
Stilly River Sage 05 Dec 20 - 09:55 AM
Donuel 05 Dec 20 - 04:21 PM
Donuel 05 Dec 20 - 06:50 PM
Donuel 05 Dec 20 - 08:10 PM
gnu 06 Dec 20 - 11:34 PM
Donuel 07 Dec 20 - 06:41 AM
Rapparee 07 Dec 20 - 09:48 AM
Stilly River Sage 07 Dec 20 - 01:19 PM
Donuel 07 Dec 20 - 07:07 PM
Rapparee 08 Dec 20 - 05:57 PM
Rapparee 08 Dec 20 - 09:36 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 09 Dec 20 - 09:46 AM
Stilly River Sage 09 Dec 20 - 10:39 AM
Rapparee 09 Dec 20 - 06:37 PM
Donuel 09 Dec 20 - 08:00 PM
Rapparee 10 Dec 20 - 08:41 PM
Stilly River Sage 10 Dec 20 - 10:03 PM
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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Nov 20 - 11:50 AM

We're staying home this year, and no, I'm not even going to the Legion Hovel. For one thing, roof of the nave caved in a couple nights ago, leading to the creation of the "Navecave" drink: grain alcohol, schnapps, Jim Beam (get it?), and prune juice concentrate. If you don't cave in Butch the Bartender will use his blackjack to see that you do.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Nov 20 - 03:43 PM

I give up

Its put up or shut up
Living is too exclusive
to be smartly cell phoneless,
I now have the great artificial brain

To be without a smart phone
is to miss the great waster of time
To not ignore your fellow man
to be free of sinister algorhythms

Now I Get to pay for my soylent green BURger
with an expensive device
WITH DIGITAL COUPON
But I won't be caught dead
on Facebook


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Nov 20 - 05:51 PM

Heil to the good ol boys
heart of the master race.
With Trump on our side    - Oy!
our blood can't be defaced

by blacks or spics or Jews.
We'll even kill the Irish
You're next, to name a few
We'll help you all to perish

by our militia's best.
It seems that some of our own
can't pass the purity test   - Oops
there goes the last good ol boy

where facists go to rest


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 23 Nov 20 - 06:21 PM

We're going to trade food for Thanksgiving; I'll hand over half of a roast chicken and some homemade dinner rolls and he'll bring by half of a pumpkin pie. Then we'll all eat dinner at our own houses. MOM said something about killing germs with some glasses of gin and tonics out on the screened in porch. (That would be fancying it up for the holiday).


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Nov 20 - 07:44 PM

At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinking I could never live without nazis on my side
But then I spent so many nights thinking how Dems did me wrong
And I grew strong
And I learned how to get along
And so they're back
From outer space
I walked in on crazy Dems with that smile upon their face
I should have changed the secret service, I should have hidden white house keys

If I'd known for just one second they'd be back to bother me
Go on now, go, walk out the door
Just turn around now
'Cause you're not welcome anywhere
Weren't you the one who tried to impeach me with your ugly lies?
You think I'd crumble?
You think I'd runaway and hide?
Oh no, not I, I will survive
Oh, as long as I know how to fire, I know I'll stay alive
I've got all my life to live
And I've got all the basest base and know that Fox news will survive
I will survive, hey, hey

It took all the strength I had not to fall apart
Kept trying hard to sue in court to mend my broken heart
And I spent oh-so many nights just feeling sorry for myself
I used to tweet
But now I tweet in complete sentences and golf some place new
I'm not that chained-up giant person born just to hate you
And so you felt like dropping in and just expect me to be free
Well, now I'm planning a long term coup for 2024
Go on now, go, walk out the door
Just turn around now
'Cause you're not welcome at my door
Weren't you the one who tried to break me with your lies?
You think I'd crumble?
You think I'd lay down and die?
Oh no, not I, I will survive
Oh, as long as I know how to golf, I know I'll stay alive
I've got all my life to live
And I've got Putin on my side so I know I will survive
I will survive
Oh
Go on now, go, walk out the door
Just turn around now
'Cause you're not for tyrants anymore
Weren't you the one who tried to hoax the news
and tell all those ugly lies?
You think I'd grow stale?
You think I'd lay down and die?
Oh no, not I, I will prevail
Oh, as long as I know how to fix elections, I know I'll stay alive
I've got all my life to live
And I've got all my hate to give and I'll survive
I will survive
I will survive

Dear Mr. Trump your biggest lie is that you will survive
No one leaves this planet alive


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Nov 20 - 08:49 PM

Oldie but still appropriate and a goody.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 24 Nov 20 - 07:02 PM

I knew about the John Birch Society since my Dad was a poli sci professor in the 50's. They the acorn that is now a tree.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Nov 20 - 05:44 PM

Has it ever occurred to anyone else that radical fringe groups have patience and goad the more precipitous among them to act so that the patient ones can use the actions against the actors?


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 25 Nov 20 - 09:05 PM

The long game is insideous. Lotsa frog boilin goin on.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 26 Nov 20 - 01:39 PM

I think it's occurring to a lot of people about now. "Frog boiling" is right!


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Nov 20 - 09:47 PM

I believe that I shall begin reading the works of Howard of Warwick.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Nov 20 - 12:39 PM

How are you feeling, Rap? Are you back to firing blunderbusses or waving various swords around?

I'm sorting out the greenhouse this afternoon, and MOM reminded me to leave the porch swing out there so she can go take a nap on sunny afternoons.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Nov 20 - 09:21 PM

If you are offering me a blunderbuss this is a nice one in 10 gauge; they also have one in 4 gauge. This kit is on USD 999.99, too, and I get to put it together. I have found that a blunderbuss is quite a good argument not to "stand and deliver" a coach!

No, I haven't been doing either in the past few months. First the SARS-Covid-19 and now surgery recovery. I probably won't make the Christmas party either. Now, as the song says, the ground is white...and going to the range in winter can be iffy. Sliding off an icy road that clings to the side of hill can test your seat belts! It's also cold and windy up there. But a set of longjohns and a good coat and hat and gloves...well, maybe.

On February 10 I present a program called something like "The Recent Crime Spree in Idaho: 1840-1910 or so" for the local continuing education group (New Knowledge Adventures, or NKA). I've done these before; this one will concentrate on names like David Updycke, Boon Helm, Henry Amos Plummer, Marion More, Jack Slade, and a few others. Bear in mind that the towns of Bannack and Virginia City, Montana were in the Idaho Territory in 1864.

In the meantime, I recuperate and play my horn. Speech therapist, a wonderful person and fellow trumpeter, said it would be excellent exercise for tongue and cheek muscles -- much better than the tongue push-ups I thought he'd order.

Swallowing is still a problem and will be for a while.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Nov 20 - 06:26 AM

In lieu of Thanksgiving travel this year I went to the nearest parallel universe where I am am glad to say there is no pandemic. However Trump is still President there so I returned the same day. It was an empty trade off coming home.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 28 Nov 20 - 01:27 PM

Apropos of nothing.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Nov 20 - 05:07 PM

That reminds me. With my new cell phone I should post a youtube of my 'unique' ukelello playing.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Nov 20 - 09:09 PM

Someday...I'll sing again. Assuming the restraining order had been lifted.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 29 Nov 20 - 06:33 AM

Do it out of State. Witnesses rarely travel long distance to testify.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Nov 20 - 06:39 PM

Out of which state? Confusion? Perplexity?


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 30 Nov 20 - 02:02 PM

State of Conciousness?

You and Stilly both obey Zipf's law but I have found that Trump does not graph at a 45 angle. This suggests Donald may have a mutation on the fox p2 gene. Trump is breaking Zipf's Law!


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 20 - 09:12 PM

Among others, yes.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 01 Dec 20 - 07:09 AM

Even Dolphin's obey Zipf's law. I like the irony of the involvment of the Fox p2 gene aiding his law breaking. That gene is respondsible for more complex vocalizations accross many species of birds to mice and men.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Dec 20 - 06:37 PM

I think that the Presidental actions are more and more representative of Titius-Bode's Law.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 02 Dec 20 - 12:21 PM

Except for the fact that his BS is toxic, Trump has been creating so much BS lately that he is *almost* an honorary member of the group. But he would be wise to subscribe to the adage that he doesn't want to join any club that would have him.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 02 Dec 20 - 07:11 PM

Today his 46 minute speech was about why Biden is not the President and named who are enemies of the people for certifying a fraud.

Death threats are the new Hallmark greeting cards.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 02 Dec 20 - 09:00 PM

Fringe speakers in Georgia are saying Trump won by 80 million votes and 410 'electrical votes'.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 20 - 09:27 PM

Saw my doctor yesterday and the surgeon today. Apparently a carotid endarterectomy is a major surgical procedure. I've been told that for the last couple of weeks, but I now have a copy of the operative notes and am forced to agree that having your throat cut is major surgery. However, the surgeon estimated that only 20 cc's of blood were lost. And from what they said I'm doing pretty well for someone who had major surgery.

The CAT scan and MRI notes say that my skull is intact and that no gross abnormalities were found...just little ones, apparently.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 03 Dec 20 - 12:32 AM

I've had surgery before, soft-tissue stuff, and a bunionectomy. The knee tops all of that for the "Major" part of major surgery. It is sometimes better that we don't realize how big these things are until after the fact.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 03 Dec 20 - 05:47 AM

A happy routine outcome with no need for bypass or gross transfusion is what you want. Every procedure has a whoops or two. When they don't matter, YOU WIN.

Other than expense, the reason there should not be routine MRI's is because they invariably show small abnormalities. In Boston I met a woman who was on the team that developed real time MRI's. Back then there was propriatary caution involved in discussions.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Dec 20 - 09:29 AM

This surgery started, according to the surgical notes, with a "time-out" until everyone agreed. I'm glad I was well under anesthesia as I probably couldn't have taken all the arguing a yelling -- I had enough of that as a kid.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Dec 20 - 09:33 AM

My last post was 1630, the number of the house where I grew to immaturity. Obviously this is A Sign, an Omen, of some sort. It must be propitious, as well. Shall I play the lottery? Perhaps even take a shower? Shall I bet that Biden wins the election? Oh, whatever can it mean?!


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 03 Dec 20 - 12:16 PM

There are some doorways you can go through with little effort but great reward. If it can't hurt go for it. Regret is burdunsome over time.

I was given the next days winning lottery # by Linda Love*.
It won without me playing


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 04 Dec 20 - 01:58 PM

Around the World in Covid days
Its a little cough and then a sneeze
and then you're on your knees
About the time your fever swells
Its hard to breathe, into your sleeve
and you feel unwell.
Of all the things you've had before
its hard to say if you'll stay or go.
In the last two days you start to fade
with no O2 its got U too
and its time, to say, goodbye.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 05 Dec 20 - 09:55 AM

Looking around the house at all of the stuff here. MOM keeps picking up interesting rocks and leaving them on the front edges of the bookshelves. With this much extra weight no wonder the foundation is shifting.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 05 Dec 20 - 04:21 PM

Texas foundations often are without basements. We noticed a marble tends to roll west on our floors.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Thats ENTERTINMENT
From: Donuel
Date: 05 Dec 20 - 06:50 PM

Anything that happens in life
Can happen in DC
You can make 'em mad
You can make 'em cry
Anything and everything goes
-
(Chorus)
[SCHUMER]
The clown
With his tweets falling down
Or the case
Right before arraignment
Or the man
That the country can't stand
That's entertainment!

[PELOSI]
The lights
On first ladies in tights

[BIDEN]
Or the bride
With a guy on the side

[SCHUMER]
Or the ball
Where she, infects them all

[BIDEN, SCHUMER, AND PELOSI]
That's entertainment!

[PELOSI]
The plot
Could be hot
Simply teeming with porn

[SCHUMER]
A gay
Senator
Who is after his ex

[BIDEN]
It could be Oedipus Rex

[SCHUMER]
Where a teen kills off the Congress
And gun nuts have wronged us.

[NANCY]
The jerk
Who is thrown out of work

[JOE]
By the boss
Who is thrown for a loss

[CHUCK]
By the flirt
Who is doing him dirt

[ALL]
The world is a stage
The stage is DC
Its entertainment!

(instrumental break)

[ALL]
The doubt
While the jury is out
Or the drill
When the judge has his fill
Or the case
For the man in disgrace
That's entertainment!

[NANCY]
The dame
Who is known as the flame

[CHUCK]
Of the king
Of an underworld ring

[CHUCK AND JOE]
He's an ape
Who won't let her escape

[ALL]
That's entertainment!
It might
Be a fight
Like you see on the screen
A gang
Getting banged
For the love of some cash
For some huge party bash
At a spot that really is sweet
And everyone ends in mincemeat.
The gag
Where he's waving the flag
That began
With a crooked con man
Hip hip hooray
The American way!
The world is a stage
The stage in DC
Is entertainment!


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 05 Dec 20 - 08:10 PM

Ah crap scrap that

edited
Anything that happens in life
Can happen in DC
You can make 'em mad
You can make 'em cry
Anything and everything goes

(Chorus)
[SCHUMER]
The clown
With his tweets falling down
Or the case
of the man in disgrace
Or the scam
That the country can't stand
That's entertainment!

[PELOSI]
The lights
On first ladies in tights

[BIDEN]
Or the bride
With a gal on the side

[SCHUMER]
Or the ball
Where she, infects them all

[BIDEN, SCHUMER, AND PELOSI]
That's entertainment!

[PELOSI]
The plot
Could be hot
Simply teeming with porn

[SCHUMER]
A gay
Senator
Who is after his ex

[BIDEN]
It was John but there never was sex

[SCHUMER]
Where a teen kills off the Congress
And gun nuts have wronged us.

[NANCY]
The jerk
Who is thrown out of work

[JOE]
By the boss
Who is thrown for a loss

[CHUCK]
By the flirt
Who is doing him dirt

[ALL]
The world is a stage
The stage is DC
Its entertainment!

(instrumental break)

[ALL]
The doubt
While the jury is out
Or the drill
When the judge has his fill
Or the case
For the man in disgrace
That's entertainment!

[NANCY]
The whore
Who Donald adored

[CHUCK]
He's the king
Of an underworld ring

[CHUCK AND JOE]
He's an ape
Who tries to escape

[ALL]
That's entertainment!
It might
Be a fight
Like you see on the screen
A gang
Getting banged
For the love of some cash
For a huge party bash
At a spot that is sweet

And everyone ends in mincemeat.

The gag
Where he's waving the flag
That began
With a crooked con man
Hip hip hooray
The American way!
The world is a stage
The stage in DC
Is entertainment!


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu
Date: 06 Dec 20 - 11:34 PM

Just dropped in to say, "I still ain't here."


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 07 Dec 20 - 06:41 AM

Behind the kitchens of Trump hotel restaurants
the dumpsters are fermenting and distilling
a dumpster juice that is rotten but addictive.
Sure it is toxic but artificially sweetened
so the rotten after taste makes people drink more
sweetened dumpster juice to hide the rotten flavor.
Compared to salty Liberal tears dumpster juice
has more appeal among people who don't drink wine.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Dec 20 - 09:48 AM

gnu, shouldn't that read "I still ain't ALL here"?


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 07 Dec 20 - 01:19 PM

That is an important distinction, though from what I read on Facebook recently there is more "all" than there was a year ago, so it may average out.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 07 Dec 20 - 07:07 PM

I am shocked, shocked that I have nothing to say in this establishment


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Dec 20 - 05:57 PM

Neither does anyone else here, so say it.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Dec 20 - 09:36 PM

Now warm with ministerial ire,
Fierce sallied forth our loyal 'Squire,
And on his striding steps attends
His desperate clan of Tory friends.
When sudden met his wrathful eye
A pole ascending through the sky,
Which numerous throngs of whiggish race
Were raising in the market-place.
Not higher school-boy's kites aspire,
Or royal mast, or country spire;
Like spears at Brobdignagian tilting,
Or Satan's walking-staff in Milton.
And on its top, the flag unfurl'd
Waved triumph o'er the gazing world,
Inscribed with inconsistent types
Of Liberty and thirteen stripes.
Beneath, the crowd without delay
The dedication-rites essay,
And gladly pay, in antient fashion,
The ceremonies of libation;
While briskly to each patriot lip
Walks eager round the inspiring flip:
Delicious draught! whose powers inherit
The quintessence of public spirit;
Which whoso tastes, perceives his mind
To nobler politics refined;
Or roused to martial controversy,
As from transforming cups of Circe;
Or warm'd with Homer's nectar'd liquor,
That fill'd the veins of gods with ichor.
At hand for new supplies in store,
The tavern opes its friendly door,
Whence to and fro the waiters run,
Like bucket-men at fires in town.
Then with three shouts that tore the sky,
'Tis consecrate to Liberty.
To guard it from th' attacks of Tories,
A grand Committee cull'd of four is;
Who foremost on the patriot spot,
Had brought the flip, and paid the shot.


By this, M'Fingal with his train
Advanced upon th' adjacent plain,
And full with loyalty possest,
Pour'd forth the zeal, that fired his breast.


"What mad-brain'd rebel gave commission,
To raise this May-pole of sedition?
Like Babel, rear'd by bawling throngs,
With like confusion too of tongues,
To point at heaven and summon down
The thunders of the British crown?
Say, will this paltry Pole secure
Your forfeit heads from Gage's power?
Attack'd by heroes brave and crafty,
Is this to stand your ark of safety;
Or driven by Scottish laird and laddie,
Think ye to rest beneath its shadow?
When bombs, like fiery serpents, fly,
And balls rush hissing through the sky,
Will this vile Pole, devote to freedom,
Save like the Jewish pole in Edom;
Or like the brazen snake of Moses,
Cure your crackt skulls and batter'd noses?


"Ye dupes to every factious rogue
And tavern-prating demagogue,
Whose tongue but rings, with sound more full,
On th' empty drumhead of his scull;
Behold you not what noisy fools
Use you, worse simpletons, for tools?
For Liberty, in your own by-sense,
Is but for crimes a patent license,
To break of law th' Egyptian yoke,
And throw the world in common stock;
Reduce all grievances and ills
To Magna Charta of your wills;
Establish cheats and frauds and nonsense,
Framed to the model of your conscience;
Cry justice down, as out of fashion,
And fix its scale of depreciation;
Defy all creditors to trouble ye,
And keep new years of Jewish jubilee;
Drive judges out, like Aaron's calves,
By jurisdiction of white staves,
And make the bar and bench and steeple
Submit t' our Sovereign Lord, The People;
By plunder rise to power and glory,
And brand all property, as Tory;
Expose all wares to lawful seizures
By mobbers or monopolizers;
Break heads and windows and the peace,
For your own interest and increase;
Dispute and pray and fight and groan
For public good, and mean your own;
Prevent the law by fierce attacks
From quitting scores upon your backs;
Lay your old dread, the gallows, low,
And seize the stocks, your ancient foe,
And turn them to convenient engines
To wreak your patriotic vengeance;
While all, your rights who understand,
Confess them in their owner's hand;
And when by clamours and confusions,
Your freedom's grown a public nuisance,
Cry "Liberty," with powerful yearning,
As he does "Fire!" whose house is burning;
Though he already has much more
Than he can find occasion for.
While every clown, that tills the plains,
Though bankrupt in estate and brains,
By this new light transform'd to traitor,
Forsakes his plough to turn dictator,
Starts an haranguing chief of Whigs,
And drags you by the ears, like pigs.
All bluster, arm'd with factious licence,
New-born at once to politicians.
Each leather-apron'd dunce, grown wise,
Presents his forward face t' advise,
And tatter'd legislators meet,
From every workshop through the street.
His goose the tailor finds new use in,
To patch and turn the Constitution;
The blacksmith comes with sledge and grate
To iron-bind the wheels of state;
The quack forbears his patients' souse,
To purge the Council and the House;
The tinker quits his moulds and doxies,
To cast assembly-men and proxies.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 09 Dec 20 - 09:46 AM

Hi, Mom!

I'm painting the exterior of my house and have run into a bit of a problem. I have finished the east, west, and south sides, but since it's December, the sun is in the southern sky all day long. The remaining northern side of the house gets no sun at all. The paint is drying very slowly and working there is just a bit on the chilly side.

What I need is a few volunteers to help me turn my house 180° so the north side becomes the south side. Not permanently, but just for a couple of days, and then we'll spin it back. Who's up for lending a hand?

If that sound like too much trouble, we could try reversing the earth's axial tilt for a few days. That would probably work just as well.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 09 Dec 20 - 10:39 AM

Try placing a few mirrors - 100 might do it - to reflect back onto that side. The work will warm you.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 20 - 06:37 PM

Build a really big fire and wrap lots and lots of aluminum foil behind it, stretched from tree to tree. This will reflect heat from the fire on the cold side, AND you can cook biscuits and cornbread at the same time.

Lasers could also work. Just get a few pointer-lasers and jack up the input to a few thousand watts.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 09 Dec 20 - 08:00 PM

Everyone is gravitating to a scientific approach involving E.
The Lord will watch the paint dry. If you used oil it may take more than your lifetime.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 20 - 08:41 PM

MOM! I thought I told you to get up there! Now do it, okay? For me, your favorite kid? Please?


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 10 Dec 20 - 10:03 PM

MOM, did you get moved to the head of the line for the COVID-19 vaccination? They're going to set up a booth at the Legion Hovel and your name should be on the list.


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