Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 08 Feb 18 - 12:07 PM

And thinking of frogprince as well.

And I hope Rapparee has less to cuss at with his recovery from surgery.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 06 Feb 18 - 12:17 PM

Keeping Gnu and those he cares for in my thoughts.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Feb 18 - 10:42 AM

Looky here!

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Mysha
Date: 05 Feb 18 - 10:13 AM

Well, "sink or swim" is when it's time for a life-line/raft/boat.

Someone in the water may need help. Helpers are coloured heroes in the press for jumping in after. But how much more courage does it require of the looker-on to admit being unable to help by himself and to go find other help?

Bye
                                                                Mysha

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 01 Feb 18 - 07:28 PM

Make that Donuel, not Donnelly, in my previous post. No, thank you, auto-correct!

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 31 Jan 18 - 06:17 PM

Donnelly, I hope it's swim for Dean.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Donuel
Date: 30 Jan 18 - 06:21 PM

I did everything Rap mentioned last summer. It works.

If doing the same thing over and over doesn't work , its insane to do it again. So Dean is off to boarding school with Psych help on staff.
It feels like sink or swim.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 29 Jan 18 - 07:19 PM

thanks, everybody,
for helping me "gird my loins"

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Mysha
Date: 29 Jan 18 - 11:39 AM

What Rapparee said, except:

When the time comes:
Don't bother with the inheritance business if you don't care and are not required to. Do bother with a ceremony of departure, but it need not be one with a coffin and people you don't care about.


Whatever the year brings, make sure to share with those you feel near to.

Bye,
                                                                Mysha

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Jan 18 - 10:45 AM

Go to the funeral, if it happens. Stay in a motel, not with family. Be courteous and polite, but not intimate -- you left long ago. When asked why you're in a motel, reply "Because I didn't want to trouble anyone" (which is completely true). If someone brings up the past, pass it off with a kind word and keep your thoughts to yourself. Don't involve yourself with hate and despair.

"Do you know that in 1947 he called my mother a gross fat pig eating slops???"
"Really?"
"You didn't know that?"
"Why, no."   

Don't point out that whoever "he" was/is was three years old. Feign polite interest in a story you've heard a thousand times and quietly leave as soon as you can. Don't take sides -- they're all probably in the wrong.

As a daughter you might be in line for some inheritance. Pay for a decent lawyer and let the lawyer handle things, and you refer everything to the lawyer (that's why you're paying a lawyer). If asked why you politely say "I wanted to be certain everyone and everything was done right." Don't fight the will (if any) but don't fold up like a cheap chair, either. The lawyer's fees will be worth the lack of hassle you'll have, and I know about that.

What has happened is past. Don't let it carry into the future. If they never speak to you again, so be it, but they are probably aware of situation and may be trying to "make the most" of it in whatever way best suits them.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 28 Jan 18 - 02:10 PM

Sticking my neck out and asking for support feels, gosh,
humiliating somehow, but here goes.

Estrangement from my family of origin
has been a necessary compromise
after an upbringing complicated by abuse and trauma.

Last year one parent died.
This year the remaining parent is suicidal: at least making the threats.

There's a lot that I don't know because I am keeping my distance.
However this year turns out,
pressure is being brought to bear, and that will continue.
One reason for this is that there are legalities and estate planning
all mixed up in the oldest generation passing away.
A more obvious reason is that nobody lets go in this family of origin.
One grandparent of mine died thirty-five years ago
with lasting legal and financial consequences,
and thirty-five years later
some people have their minds firmly closed to the notion
that things might be different now.
You get the idea?

I seriously can't predict what's coming,
but I dread the worst. Thanks for listening.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: gnu
Date: 27 Jan 18 - 07:55 PM

No need to worry. I am on sub-lurk. Just got 'stuff' to tend to.

Carry on. Smoke 'em if ya got 'em. Tight lines and straight shooting to all.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jan 18 - 08:45 PM

I went to my massage therapist today and she asked what the red dots on my arms were.

An hour after the massage therapy I had an appointment with my dermatologist. He said, "Strep psoriasis" and ordered a corticosteroid cream, twice a day for fourteen days and call then if it's not any better.

Well, it's annoying. Still, it could be a lot worse. No, no itching or anything. Just dry skin and red dots.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 25 Jan 18 - 06:49 PM

Ranger1, my condolences. Especially for the fact that you are down for the count, and you have a Tennessee Brat Terrier with enough energy for several of you . . . hope Beau is not going stir-crazy.

Donuel, you are onto something, and you and your son are lucky to have each other.

Gnu, I know you're a tough hombre, and you'll be back amongst us eventually, but I worry for you.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Mysha
Date: 25 Jan 18 - 05:53 PM

But be wary when you're shopping
Where there's marble on the floor
For the customers go flying
When the rain's come in the door.

(With a nod to Les Rice.)

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ranger1
Date: 25 Jan 18 - 02:29 PM

Ouch, Wendy! Pamper yourself! And great news about Billy.

I've been down for the count with the flu since Sunday. Been about 15 years since I last had it, so I guess I was due. But I missed my snowshoe race on Sunday :(

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: billybob
Date: 25 Jan 18 - 08:28 AM

Had good news yesterday when we saw Billy' s consultant he said his blood counts were excellent and he will see us again in 4 months, still on the trial so regular appointments continue. He also told us that the research into the chemotherapy that has been done in the USA shows that the results for patients like Billy can be very positive and they can be in remission for a long time, year 5 now so fingers crossed.I have said before that the NHS treatment in our local hospital has been incredible and I am so sad when they get a bad press, just takes one bad Apple!

Went into Colchester town for shopping and celebration lunch, it was pouring down with rain and as we went into one shop the marble floor was wet and I went flying and today I am in bed with a very painfull knee and stiff back and hip!! Lucky I didnt need to return to the hospital, nothing broken except my dignity??

I should be tackling the mountain of ironing but enjoying a lie down,cup of tea and good book.

Sending love to all the crew
Wendy xxxxxx

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Janie
Date: 23 Jan 18 - 02:09 PM

I Think Of You.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Jan 18 - 12:26 PM

I had a long conversation with Dean that bowled me over with his knowledge of receptors, dopamine and addiction. Mainly his insight rivals some of the most insightful folks here. Real gritty and tangible progress is being made without the blame games that plague our infantile Congress.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Jan 18 - 11:54 AM

Internet Addiction is in most cases simply abuse (6.5 hours a day) but in cases where it alters sleep cycles it is a moderate addiction. It become a serious health hazard when withdraw from real life and depression occurs. As with any behavioral addiction there is little research and a large skeptical suspicion of its existence. The creators of the games or platforms are not going to take responsibility.

What is being thrown at the problem are anti-depressants. You can look at the increase in prescriptions in the UK but that is only anecdotal. The number of kids worldwide who are seriously depressed from an addiction to digital heroin may be as high as 30 million.

The emergent problem is a deliberate attempt to addict for profit and is only 9 years old. What will it be like in 15 or 20 years?

Physically the problem coincides with up to a 8% loss in connective white fiber tissue. It can be restored. Time can not.

The symptoms present in different ways in certain cultures, some hideous and some just sad.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Jan 18 - 12:15 AM

The mystery in plain sight is solved. Dean has what 50 million other kids get in the world but recovery is possible. He has IGA specifically. I have been complicit in causing his depression and withdrawal from life. I have been giving him heroin for 10 years,
digital heroin.

Neurological resets take up to two months but to recover the 8% of lost white fiber connections beneath his brain's grey matter will take much longer, perhaps a lifetime.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 21 Jan 18 - 06:16 PM

good to see you have a new interest that involves creative thinking

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 21 Jan 18 - 01:53 PM

refresh

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 19 Jan 18 - 01:14 PM

Good to hear from frogprince!
No words can convey the desolation you are having to live through.
Thanks for keeping in touch.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: frogprince
Date: 18 Jan 18 - 10:40 PM

Thanks; I think I can say that I'm getting back to where I'm not a real mess too much of the time. I'm getting back into some of the positive parts of old routines, and have stumbled into a new hobby that absorbs me in some creative thinking.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 18 Jan 18 - 06:13 PM

Thinking of frogprince and gnu. Hope you and yours are hanging in there.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 18 Jan 18 - 06:02 PM

That long ago? How can that be?
Thank you, Nigel, for creating this thread which has brought comfort to many.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 18 Jan 18 - 11:55 AM

We first set sail on 12th January, 2012...Happy belated Anniversary
                   With Love to All,
                                              Nigel.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 14 Jan 18 - 03:38 PM

Hoisting an extra sail as we head into 2018.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Mysha
Date: 11 Jan 18 - 11:56 AM

Just checking the sheets.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 08 Jan 18 - 10:51 AM

refresh

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 05 Jan 18 - 05:19 PM

Fellow mudcatter Gnu, have you all dug yourselves out from the storm?
Thinking of everyone here
who has reason for a deep ache inside.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: billybob
Date: 03 Jan 18 - 02:25 PM

Wishing everyone a very Happy and healthy New Year.
Much love
Wendy xxxxxx

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Pete from seven stars link
Date: 31 Dec 17 - 08:07 PM

Happy new year to all the crew

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 31 Dec 17 - 06:33 PM

you could have some of our warmth! It's 30C (86F) here, already 2C past today's expected maximum at 10.30am on New Years day.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 31 Dec 17 - 03:11 PM

Thanks, Mysha, for checking in -- good to hear from you.

It's gotta be cold where Gnu and his Mom are.
Wishing them a warm happy healthy New Year.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Janie
Date: 30 Dec 17 - 05:47 PM

Gnu, {{{{hugs}}} to your Mum, and also to you.

It occurs to me that this song is about all kinds of love. This ship is carried by love/agape. This Love

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 28 Dec 17 - 07:37 PM

It's bitterly bitterly cold outside.

Thanks be for the warmth of this thread
and those who keep posting to it.
Awfully glad you're here.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Janie
Date: 27 Dec 17 - 12:50 AM

Yes. Happy and sad. A time for reflection.

So much wisdom is shared here, on this Rainbow ship. Wisdom that can only be gained from the direct and long experience of sailing the sea of life.

No wonder then, that this ship sails on, fair winds or foul.

Thank you.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Dec 17 - 08:50 PM

Yes. This is a happy and sad season.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Pete from seven stars link
Date: 25 Dec 17 - 04:53 PM

Christmas best wished to all the crew . Like others here it's not all plain sailing , but with us it's just the deep sadness and tears of Christmas without tommy .

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Dec 17 - 09:07 PM

It's been a hectic few days.

On the 17th my (first) cousin Kathy passed away from brain cancer.

My massage therapist wouldn't work on me until I clearance from the surgeon. But we went over to her house today and had brunch with her, her husband John (who was on EMT calls last night -- he works with the fire department), her kids, her dogs, and her parents. A good time!

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: JennieG
Date: 24 Dec 17 - 05:57 PM

Best wishes to all for a season of peace and love, no matter what you celebrate....or whether you celebrate at all.

Slightly anxious time here for two aging parents. Our younger son Doug The Canaussian who lives in Toronto, Canada, had a hand operation a couple of days ago. Some time ago he was diagnosed with a vascular tumour in his left hand which although it isn't cancerous behaves like cancer, so is treated as such. Chemotherapy didn't work so he went under the knife to remove several tumours, and also had reconstructive surgery including bone grafts. He no longer has a left index finger, it's gone. Apparently the surgery went well and doctors are pleased.

Seems he is one of only 50 cases known world-wide. We always knew our boys were special - but that's not how we wanted them to be unique!

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Donuel
Date: 24 Dec 17 - 05:24 PM

Christmas eve is a good time to update the progress of Tiny Tim.
He has had some adventures like his 21 year old girlfriend and showing his face but still not going to school. A boarding school out of town is in the works where there are no laptops and freedom is earned by a point system. It drives mom to tears but the real world is a jungle he needs to learn to navigate. My proposition that children deserve intellectual freedom has failed. He is participating in Christmas customs which feeds hope a snack. Its like tiny Tim has gone from two canes to just one.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Mysha
Date: 24 Dec 17 - 04:51 PM

Hi,

It's Christmas Eve (here). A time for reflection, it seems, but I don't have any profound words of wisdom to share. I'm just grateful for you guys (f/m) turning things over for me sometimes, so I get to see the sides I can't see on my own.

I guess, this evening I'm a bit nostalgic for easier times. So, forgive me my reference to a sentimental ditty from some 75 years ago.

                                                                Mysha

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: gnu
Date: 19 Dec 17 - 07:03 PM

Long and tough haul here. Haven't taken the time to do any heavy lifting. Just tending FB groups and such. Might even do some laundry tonight... or tomorrow... whatever. Keeping it light. Merry Ho Ho. Dog bless us all, Tim.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 18 Dec 17 - 07:27 PM

Respected Rapparee,
forgive the pedantry,
but about your massage therapist --

was that
won't work in you,
or won't work you in ??

(rather vivid non-verbal image)

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 18 Dec 17 - 07:26 PM

Merry Ho Ho to you as well, Mudcatter Gnu.

Thinking of you all
especially
Pete, frogprince, Mysha, Janie, and ranger1's J-Boy.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: frogprince
Date: 15 Dec 17 - 12:37 PM

Since it got mentioned again: you may get an adult warning if you click my link (I guess because Flickr allows just about anything) but you won't get connected to anything but the card.

Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Dec 17 - 10:11 AM

Went to the surgeon yesterday to have what stitches there were out. He's pleased and I'll see him again on the 25th. My massage therapist isn't pleased and won't work in me until after I next see the surgeon and get clearance. Yes, there is still pain, especially when the healing edges of the cuts are stretched, but it's nothing that can't be handily handled.