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Mad Magazine parodies

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GUEST 05 Nov 19 - 05:49 PM
clueless don 04 Oct 19 - 06:17 AM
GUEST 03 Oct 19 - 10:20 AM
GUEST,.gargoyle 07 Jul 19 - 02:24 PM
GUEST,GUEST 07 Jul 19 - 10:53 AM
GUEST 07 Jul 19 - 05:30 AM
GUEST,Fred Maslan 05 Jul 19 - 03:06 PM
GUEST,Rabbit Hole hopper 03 Jul 19 - 01:42 AM
GUEST 01 Jul 19 - 07:27 PM
GUEST,Carle Place 11 May 19 - 11:30 PM
GUEST,Kosmo! 01 May 19 - 10:44 PM
GUEST,Real Old Fan 24 Apr 19 - 06:09 PM
clueless don 05 Apr 19 - 06:36 AM
GUEST,Mrturk 04 Apr 19 - 02:47 PM
GUEST,Mrturk 04 Apr 19 - 02:40 PM
GUEST,Mrturk 04 Apr 19 - 02:39 PM
GUEST 28 Mar 19 - 10:42 AM
GUEST,Guest 08 Mar 19 - 02:04 AM
GUEST,Dave 19 Feb 19 - 02:05 PM
Donuel 24 Dec 18 - 08:43 AM
GUEST,Guest67 21 Dec 18 - 12:31 PM
robomatic 08 Dec 18 - 08:16 PM
GUEST,Fred 08 Dec 18 - 01:58 PM
GUEST,Fred 08 Dec 18 - 01:32 PM
Donuel 29 Nov 18 - 08:54 PM
GUEST,GUEST 27 Nov 18 - 04:55 PM
EBarnacle 15 Aug 18 - 12:00 AM
GUEST 14 Aug 18 - 12:43 AM
GUEST,Guest mad reader 12 Jul 18 - 04:28 PM
GUEST,Neon Leon 11 Feb 18 - 09:43 PM
Donuel 07 Nov 17 - 06:42 PM
GUEST,Iddo.Effie 05 Nov 17 - 12:25 PM
GUEST,Jim Belesky 10 May 17 - 11:54 PM
GUEST,newtonsmum 29 Mar 17 - 01:52 PM
GUEST,itsy 15 Jan 17 - 01:04 PM
GUEST 03 Aug 16 - 10:52 AM
GUEST 19 May 16 - 04:23 PM
GUEST,skylarkbc 13 May 16 - 01:19 AM
GUEST,Bill_R 10 May 16 - 11:12 PM
GUEST,SGKingdom 07 May 16 - 01:52 PM
GUEST,To the tune of the Air Force Song 17 Feb 16 - 11:56 PM
GUEST,Tune of the Marine Corps Hymn 17 Feb 16 - 11:44 PM
GUEST,Suzanne, Australia 19 Jan 16 - 02:46 AM
GUEST,Bob johns 14 Dec 15 - 12:17 PM
GUEST,A Guy From Baltimore 01 Dec 15 - 04:43 PM
GUEST,Anita 23 Nov 15 - 06:16 PM
clueless don 23 Nov 15 - 09:06 AM
GUEST,Montreal88 22 Nov 15 - 11:12 PM
GUEST,Ebor Fiddler 20 Nov 15 - 08:42 AM
clueless don 19 Nov 15 - 08:38 AM
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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Nov 19 - 05:49 PM

DOES ANYONE KNOW THE MAD LYRICS FOR XMAS SONG LET IT SNOW...
EG OH THE WEATHER OUTSIDE IS SNOWING
AND THE GARBAGE MEN AREN'T SHOWING......ETC


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: clueless don
Date: 04 Oct 19 - 06:17 AM

GUEST, the third of your parodies looks like it was sung to "Bless 'em All".


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Oct 19 - 10:20 AM

These might be repeats, i didnt have time to read all of these comments, just found this page but had to contribute. THanks for sharing all of these! I loved these.

sung to: Off We Go Into The Wild Blue Yonder

Off we go into the lunch room yonder
pushing girls out of our way
Forward boys start moving down the counter
Grab your grub, fill up your tray.
Try the beans, they were prepared last Friday
and the meat's tough as a mule
The soup is cold,
The breads got mold, YECH!
anything beats our lunchroom at school.

Oh how I loved these parodies. I'm 63 and still have them in my head.

Sung to: As the Caissons Go Rolling Along

In a test
for a class
that we know we just cant pass,
see the goof offs go faking along
start to heave, fake a chill
anything so you'll look ill
as the goof offs go faking along
For its hi hi hoo
lets all fake the Asian flu
Shout out your symptoms loud and strong
Blah, Ech!
we will feel enthused
when the teacher says excused
as the goof offs go faking along.

Cant remember the actual tune of this one.
Cheat em all
cheat em all
in the springtime
the winter
and fall.
those Lincoln quotations
we hide in our fist
that Longfellow verse
written on our left wrist.
If you find,
that your mind cant recall,
the date when the Romans took Gaul,
a glance at your kneecap will help you recap
so why take a chance
Cheat em all!


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,.gargoyle
Date: 07 Jul 19 - 02:24 PM

Nice article about MAD publication.

Humorist "Weird Al Yankovic" gives a nod to the magazine leading him to his musical discovery of, " “I certainly went beyond Mad magazine to discover Spike Jones and Stan Freberg and Tom Lehrer, but it all started with Mad ..."

https://beta.washingtonpost.com/arts-entertainment/2019/07/04/mad-magazine-pioneer-modern-satire-will-soon-cease-publishing-new-content/?outputType=amp


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,GUEST
Date: 07 Jul 19 - 10:53 AM

In the fifties cars had fins and lots of chrome. MAD parodied that to the Marine Corps Hymn.

From the gaudy grills of Cadillac to the fins of Chevrolet,
We will push GM's new models and make obsolescence pay.
So to heck with Ford and Chrysler, boys,
And to sports cars from afar,
We won't stop 'til every family owns a brand new GM car!


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Jul 19 - 05:30 AM

school lunchroom song sung to the tune of off we go


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Fred Maslan
Date: 05 Jul 19 - 03:06 PM

Latest news

MAD Magazine is ceasing publication.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Rabbit Hole hopper
Date: 03 Jul 19 - 01:42 AM

From the slums of Baltic Avenue,
To the Boardwalk and Park Place,
We will buy up all the properties,
Build hotels on every space.
We will drive our folks to bankruptcy,
If they fail to pay our price,
But we cannot even start the game,
Until someone finds the dice!


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 01 Jul 19 - 07:27 PM

My Blue Shelter

A hole in the floor, a six inch lead door
We're happy in my blue shelter.

You'll see a smiling face with out a trace of coming doom
A little nest that's nestled where the H-bombs boom.

Just Molly and me, let's see that makes three.
We're happy in my blue shelter.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Carle Place
Date: 11 May 19 - 11:30 PM

Sung to the tune of "Try to Remember" from The Fantasticks

Try to remember, this coming November, and vote for Neuman, vote for Neuman,

Change your direction, don't look for perfection, and vote for Neuman, vote for Neuman,

Alfred E. Neuman, with brains of albumin, will win just like Truman did from Missouri.

Back him today, and the country can say, "What me worry, worry, worry, worry, worry, worry".

Mad Magazine, June 1972 ?
(additional lyrics/details welcome)


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Kosmo!
Date: 01 May 19 - 10:44 PM

Does anyone recall a song parody about a dive restaurant called "This Place" sung to the tune of This Train is Bound for Glory"...?

Here is some of what I remember:

This place got surly waiters, this place.
This place got surly waiters, this place.
This place got surly waiters, watery soups and half-baked 'taters,
This place to no one caters, this place.

I'm remembering this from almost 50 years ago and I think the issue would be older than that. Loved Mad!


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Real Old Fan
Date: 24 Apr 19 - 06:09 PM

Jack and Jill

You can talk of blood'n gore when you're in a shooting war
And the enemy is charging for the hill -
But if you're liking slaughter,
Then you ought a haul some water,
Like that brave and fearless couple, Jack and Jill.

Well they had a pail to fill
When they climbed that craggy hill
And they never thought that soon they would be dead;
But Jack he too a fall and bounced just like a ball
Til he landed in a a gully on his head.

He hollered, "Jill, Jill, Jill!
I'm a lying at the bottom of the hill"
But poor Jill had plunged as well and they died right where they fell.
You've a lot more guts than I have, Jack and Jill.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: clueless don
Date: 05 Apr 19 - 06:36 AM

From East Side Story:

Please be sweet to us
and give a seat to us ...

[This was Mao asking that Red China be admitted to the UN - sung to the tune of "There's a place for us".]


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Mrturk
Date: 04 Apr 19 - 02:47 PM

I read MAD from the late 50's to the mid 70's. I considered 'East Side Story' the best parody they ever did. Great lyrics and a good finish. The artwork had lots of little things in it. Songs included, 'Nikita, I just met a Red named Nikita'; 'Dear Commissar Khrushchev'.
Check out this line from their version of 'America':
"Life is a whiz in America,
Eddie met Liz in America,
Thought she was his in America,
Well, that's show biz in America.
You'll like the weather in Moscow,
If you like driving a snow plow."


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Mrturk
Date: 04 Apr 19 - 02:40 PM

Here's another verse:
Weekends we,
Would go and see,
What used to be,
Schenectady.
We'll shout with glee,
The thruway will be free.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Mrturk
Date: 04 Apr 19 - 02:39 PM

The way I remembered it:

There's a bright golden cloud in our backyeard,
There's the smell of charred beef in our backyard.
The scene may appear.
As an A-bomb dropped here,
But it's only our barbecue out in the rear,
Oh, what a beautiful beefsteak,
Oh, what a thick tenderloin.
Too bad my pop likes to cook out,
Burned to a crisp, it'll boin.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 28 Mar 19 - 10:42 AM

Guest: Wry Mouth


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Guest
Date: 08 Mar 19 - 02:04 AM

Huntley, Huntley on my screen,
Dullest newsman I have seen.
What infernal network plan,
Makes thee such a boring man?

Brinkley, Brinkley cute and bright,
Coining quips each weekday night,
x
x

x
x
Huntley, Brinkley I detest,
I'll get my news on CBS


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Dave
Date: 19 Feb 19 - 02:05 PM

Sung to the tune of "Button up your Overcoat"

Buckle up your helmet strap, hide behind a tree,
there's a riot again down at PS3.
Don't go near the picket line, that's no place to be,
they may fracture your skull down at PS3.
Beware of roughneck nuts, oooo,
switchblade cuts, oooo, trooper's mutts, oooo.
You'll get a bite in your tummy tum tum tum.
Keep away from flying rocks they bay break your knee.
Life at school nowadays is like world war 3.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Donuel
Date: 24 Dec 18 - 08:43 AM

The first movie I saw and could retell was Attack of the 50 foot Woman.
This month the cover of Mad is Attack of the 50 ft Trump.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Guest67
Date: 21 Dec 18 - 12:31 PM

When I was about 10, my friend and I would sing Mad Magazine parodies for my dad. He would laugh until his stomach hurt, his face was red, and he had to take off his glasses and wipe his eyes between bellows of laughter. I remember several, my favorite being this one. Here's most of it, sung to the tune of "Love is Blue:

News, News, It's time for News
Cronkite is here, so what can you lose?
News, News, World leaders' views
Brezhnev, and Mao, and George Pompidou

(Line I can't remember--can anyone help?
(Line I can't remember--can anyone help?
News, News, Domestic News,
News of the Mob, that you can't refuse

When we're through
And the world's picked clean,
Sevareid will explain what you've seen!

Bought the Mad Magazine Anniversary book and was disappointed to see that the song lyrics didn't make it. They probably had no idea how many people loved them and still remember them. In my case, it's been around 45 years, and I'm missing two lines.
Funny what sticks with you. I can't remember where I've put my phone or car keys, but I remember the whole skit we laid out for my dad.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: robomatic
Date: 08 Dec 18 - 08:16 PM

No song but when I was in high school I got to visit the Soviet Union. For my onflight reading I took a copy of MAD magazine where they were skewering the movie version of "Catch-22". The magazine cover was a big headed Alfred E. Neuman in WWII flight gear smiling his inimitable grin. Got some interesting double takes going through Soviet Customs!


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Fred
Date: 08 Dec 18 - 01:58 PM

Off we go
Into the lunchroom yonder
Pushing girls, out of the way.
Forward boys,
Start moving down the counter,
Grab your grub, fill up your tray.
Try the beans, they were prepared last Friday,
And the meat's tough as a mule.
The soup is cold
The bread's got mold
Yech! Anything beats the lunchroom at our school.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Fred
Date: 08 Dec 18 - 01:32 PM

Off we go
Into the lunchroom yonder
Pushing girls, out of the way.
Forward boys,
Start moving down the counter,
Grab your grub, fill up your tray.
Try the beans, they were prepared last Friday,
And the meat's tough as a mule.
The soup is cold
The bread's got mold
Yech! Anything beats the lunchroom at our school.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Donuel
Date: 29 Nov 18 - 08:54 PM

GUESTGUEST Kent had a Micronite filter ( short for micronitroglycerin )


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Subject: RE: TO A SMOKER, IT'S A KENT
From: GUEST,GUEST
Date: 27 Nov 18 - 04:55 PM

To a sheriff, it's a top gun's shot,
to a rustler, it's a hangman's knot,
to a cowboy, it's a mad stampede,
to a smoker, it's a weed.

To a bigot, it's a Jew next door,
to a klansman, it's a guy from CORE,
to a bircher, it's a Commie nut,
to a smoker, it's a butt.

To a diver, it's a hungry shark,
to a stroller, it's a Central Park,
to a hunter, it's a wild stag,
to a smoker, it's a drag.

To an ulcer, it's a shot of booze,
to a weak heart, it's some shocking news,
to a deep cut, it could be gangrene,
to a smoker, nicotine.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: EBarnacle
Date: 15 Aug 18 - 12:00 AM

In the years this thread has been running, there has been mention of some of the regular guest contributors, especially from the '50's but who can forget Tom Lehrer, whose every printed utterance was a glorious epic parody of entire generae without having to say "I'm writing something to the melody of X." Consider "The Wild West is where I want to be" and many others. I am glad he is still with us but regret his retirement.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Aug 18 - 12:43 AM

I'm searching Alfred E., for a classic from around(1960) the time between throwing lemons at cars and finally getting it wet. A dentist song to the tune of the Air Force song.
Off we go,Into the wild mouth yonder, looking for molars to fill. There's a tooth ready to feel out thunder, at em boy's, give em the dril..???/@#$%^&*()@@##DFDI'..................I've lost the middle part and that section of my brain, but
IF YOU REMEBER THE LAST STANZA OF THE AIR FORCE song, I guess it's a song
WHEN WE'RE IN DOUBT
WE PULL THEM OUT
OH' N0THING CAN STOP THE DENTISTS TODAY


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Guest mad reader
Date: 12 Jul 18 - 04:28 PM

I think the last few lines for "watchdog in the the night" go something like this:
    Whenever I'm in sight-
    it's so upsetting
    Every time you bite-
    it's me you're getting
    ooooh! ooooh! ooooh!
    my watchdog in the nighttt


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Neon Leon
Date: 11 Feb 18 - 09:43 PM

Casey at the Dice by Frank Jacobs

The table wasn't breaking for the Vegas crowd that night,
The house was up 12 thousand, with no change of luck in sight;
So, when Epstein came up snake-eyes and Spinelli missed his point,
A mood of deep depression could be felt throughout the joint.

The dollar-bettors, cleaned of cash, were heading for the door,
But all the big high-rollers stayed to even up the score;
They said: "If only Casey had a chance to roll the dice,
We'd have a chance to change our luck, which now is cold as ice."

Then, suddenly, their eyes lit up, a cry rose from their lips,
It echoed off the slot machines, it rattled off the chips;
It rumbled through the Black Jack games as cards were being dealt,
For Casey, lucky Casey, was advancing to the felt!

His nails were cleanly manicured, his face was richly tanned,
His suit was iridescent silk that cost him half a grand;
The cuff-links on his sheer batiste were rubies from afar,
Between his teeth he cooly smoked a ninety-cent cigar!

There was ease in Casey's manner as he calmly placed his bet,
His hands were steady as a rock, his palms were free of sweat;
The other shooters, now revived, together had one goal,
To place each C-note they had left on Casey and his roll!

With confidence and quiet pride he gripped the cubes of white,
Then, blowing on them softly, he prepared them for their flight;
"A seven, dice," he murmured, as he looked up to the sky,
And a hush went 'round the table as he raised his arm on high!

The cool is drained from Casey's face, his eyes are tense and keen
And all along his sun-drenched brow deep furrows can be seen;
And now he firmly hold the dice, and now he lets them go,
And now the air is shattered by the force of Casey's throw!

Oh, somewhere in this wealthy land there is a happy spot,
Where naturals are being rolled, and dice are running hot;
And somewhere men are doubling up and winners scream and shout,
But there is no joy in Vegas -- Lucky Casey has crapped out!


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Donuel
Date: 07 Nov 17 - 06:42 PM

Who still has their record 'It's a Gas'?


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Iddo.Effie
Date: 05 Nov 17 - 12:25 PM

Some filler for GUEST,jesfine

From "College Fight songs we'd like to hear"
To the tune "Anchors Away":

On to the fray, my boys
On to the fray!
Kill those who block our path and
grind their bones to Clay!(clay, clay. clay)

We're mighty Pivnick men
stalwart and strong!
We'll beat the visitors
as soon as we conclude this modest song!


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Jim Belesky
Date: 10 May 17 - 11:54 PM

I was at an amateur folk event a couple of weeks ago. One act played Dylan's Blowing in the Wind. Afterwards, I looked online to see if anyone posted the version 'The Sponsors will sell you all they can'. Lines like
How many times must you gargle each day
Before you talk to a friend
The sponsors my friend, will sell you all they can
The sponsors will sell you all they can


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,newtonsmum
Date: 29 Mar 17 - 01:52 PM

Can anyone fill in the rest of this? All I can remember is:
(To the tune of My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean)

On Look there's a cop shooting tear gas
On Life there's a thug set to kill
A hate-group is pictured on Harper's
A young junkie's on Jack & Jill

That's how, that's how,
That's how you sell magazines today.
That's how, that's how, that's how you sell magazines


There was also a line about "a mad dog is on Field & Steam"


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,itsy
Date: 15 Jan 17 - 01:04 PM

If anyone knows the rest of these lyrics:

I have often walked down your street before
but there once was pavement underneath my feet before.
Now when I walk by I see rubble fly, knowing I'm on the street where you live.

This must have been late 50's or early 60's during the cold war.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Aug 16 - 10:52 AM

A couple I remember from back at least 40-50 years ago:

The Langscaper's Song.
(sung to the tune of The Marine Song)

From the ants in our petunia beds
To the crabgrass on our lawns
We will fight them off with chemicals
'Til the bugs and weeds are gone.

We'll use quarts and quarts of poison sprays
And we won't stop 'til we're through
All the bugs and weeds are dying now
But the plants and trees are too.


The Mafia Song:
(Battle Hymn of the Republic)

Mine eyes have sen the gory of the coming of the mob
With an ice pick or a .45 they knock off every slob
The Don gives all the orders for each big or little job
Godfather marches on.

Gory, gory how they slew ya
Gory, gory how they slew ya
Gory, gory how they slew ya
Godfather marches on.

When the boss puts out a contract in your head they'll make a dent
Then they'll wrap you in an overcoat that's made of cement
On the bottom of the river, you'll become a reseden
Godfather marches on.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 19 May 16 - 04:23 PM

oH YOU DONT HAVE TO WORRY IF YOUR COMPLEXION IS GOOD WHEN YOU'RE OUT TO TERRORIZE THE NEIGHBORHOOD.
aND YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY IF YOU'LL BE HOME SOON WHEN YOU LIVE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BLACK LAGOON.

iNCOMPLETE FRAGMENTS OF SUPERNATURALLY FROM MANNY GET YOUR GHOUL, BASED LOOSELY ON ANNIE GET YOUR GUN

iDA TARBELL
MR1111@CHARTER.NET


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,skylarkbc
Date: 13 May 16 - 01:19 AM

Still in the memory banks:
Melvin, Norman and Fred one night
sailed off in a garbage scow
Sailed down a river of floating blight
with coffee grounds on the prow
Stuff that's rotten and ripe have we
Said Melvin, Norman and Fred.

The Coast Guard scowled and searched the three
as they rocked in the garbage scow
they found smuggled guns in kegs marked 'tea'
and contraband in the prow
We wonder who could have put that stuff there,
surely it wasn't we
So whimpered aloud the smugglers three
Melvin, Norman and Fred

Melvin and Fred are in Leavenworth
and Norman's on the Rock
The garbage scow has a lovely berth
in custody at the dock
Melvin's due out in '64 and Fred in '73
Norman he tried to go over the wall
but a guard he happened to see
and that was the end of one-third of the three
Melvin, [deceased] and Fred


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Bill_R
Date: 10 May 16 - 11:12 PM

The Monopoly song was part of the "fight songs for lesser school teams" (along with the bridge team song). The whole lyric, IIRC:

To the tune of the Marines' Hymn:

From the slums of Baltic Avenue
'Round Boardwalk and Park Place
We will buy up all the prop-er-ties
Build hotels on every space.
We will drive our foes to bank-rup-tcy
If they fail to pay the price…
But we cannot even start the game
'Till somebody finds the dice.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,SGKingdom
Date: 07 May 16 - 01:52 PM

The WW3 aftermath songs were my favorites.
Thanks for the "Street Where You Live"

Here's "My Blue Shelter"
"Whenever I hear
A bomb threat is near
I hurry to my blue shelter
A hole in the floor
A six inch lead door
Will lead you to my blue shelter

You'll see a smiling face
Without a trace of coming doom
A little nest that's nestled where
The H bombs boom

Just Molly and me
Let's see, that makes three
We're happy in my blue shelter"

I never understood that last part, but when I was younger, it was hilarious.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,To the tune of the Air Force Song
Date: 17 Feb 16 - 11:56 PM

Off we go into the barracks yonder,
Pulling an inspection again.
Roar right in just like a clap of thunder
Scare the hell out of the men.

Gig 'em all, this is no time to blunder
Get KPs like never before.
We live to harass the enlisted class.
Nothing can stop the Chicken Brass Corps.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Tune of the Marine Corps Hymn
Date: 17 Feb 16 - 11:44 PM

From the halls of old ROTC
To the rooms at OCS
We are taught that all enlisted men
Have to live in great distress.

So, we badger and annoy them
With our chores both cruel and mean,
And instead of fighting battles
They are cleaning up latrines.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies - Poe Business
From: GUEST,Suzanne, Australia
Date: 19 Jan 16 - 02:46 AM

It's the 19th January 2016 today
and the 207th birthday of Edgar Allan Poe (1809 - 1849)

I remembered a fantastic parody I copied from Mad Magazine. My choir friends and I loved to sing this in the late 1960s

Thank you so much to Neil Koro for his posts in January and May 2013.
You and Mudcat have made my day
You helped fill in the gaps for me, so between us, this is what I have come up with. I hope you like it.


"There's no business like Poe Business"
(to the tune "There's no business like show business")

There's no business like Poe business ,
Like no business I know.
If you want a tale that is appalling,
If you want to murmur, shriek and cry,
If you want to hear strange bodies falling,
And spirits calling, then Poe's your guy.

There's no stories like Poe stories ,
They all fill us with woe.
If you want a tale that's filled with death galore,
With spirits tapping upon your door,
And some crazy raven shrieking, "Nevermore!"
There's no business like Poe.


Hollywood is constantly looking for new ideas or producing endless sequels (or prequels)
But now that there are so many special effects available,
perhaps now would be an excellent time to resurrect Poe's stories and restore him to greatness.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Bob johns
Date: 14 Dec 15 - 12:17 PM

Watchdog in the night (Song to the tune of Strangers In The Night)

Watchdog in the night
I've never chained you
Watchdog in the night
I've always trained you
To proctor my house, until the night was through

Watchdog in the night
A stupid beagle you were
Watchdog in the night

And when those burglars came
You didn't mind it
They were after loot
You helped them find it
Diamonds, rings and furs
You quickly led them to

Watchdog in the night
A stupid beagle you were
Watchdog in the night

And later on when I returned to my poor home
How you jaws did foam
You became a snapping dog
A wild and fearless yapping dog
And ever since that night
It's so upsetting
Every time you bite
It's me your getting
It turned out so right
For watchdog in the night


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,A Guy From Baltimore
Date: 01 Dec 15 - 04:43 PM

Did a Google search for Mad song parodies, as I grew up reading the book collections (such as "Sing Along With Mad" and "Mad About Verse." I remember one of the military anthems in full:

(Marine Corps Hymn)
From the neck-high mud of fo-ox holes
To malaria-filled bogs
We will march for ninety miles a day
And drop out and die like dogs

We will land on mine-strewn beaches
And we'll live with snakes and fleas
Then we'll all leave Parris Island for
Restful combat overseas!

and part of the Air Force hymn...
Off we go, into the barracks yonder,
Pulling an inspection again...
Roar right in, just like a clap of thunder
Scare the hell out of the men!

To the tune of "Aquarius" (from the musical "Hair")
When the sun is blotted out of sight
And both your eyes begin to burn
And you can't see the freeway
To make
That left hand turn
You know you're driving in the
Smog of Los Angeles!
Smog of Los Angeles!
Los Angeleeeees!


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Anita
Date: 23 Nov 15 - 06:16 PM

Does anyone remember the parody of Gunga Din? It was probably from the late 70s/early 80s...?? It was fro an article called "Mad Takes on The Classics" Or something like that. All I remember is the beginning:

Oh, you can talk of blood and gore
If your in a shooting war,
and the enemy is rushing for the kill.

But if you're' wanting slaughter,
Then you ought to haul some water,
Like that brave and fearless couple,
Jack and Jill.

Poor Jack and Jill,
They went rushing up that hill,
And nary one thought they'd loose their life!

..and the ending,
You're a braver man than I am,
Jack and Jill!!!


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: clueless don
Date: 23 Nov 15 - 09:06 AM

"My Fair Ad-Man"
"Star Blecch"

and on. and on.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Montreal88
Date: 22 Nov 15 - 11:12 PM

(Tune of "Stranger in Paradise")

Let's play cards
I'm no good with a pair o' dice.

There was another song to the tune of "Isle of Capri" with a line:
I found her there
On a pile of debris.

Remember the "Mad Beastlies"? One had a drawing of two native Indians with brooms on top of a huge 2-headed man. The quote read: "Braves Sweep Giant Doubleheader".

Movie and TV parodies I remember:
"201 Minutes of a Space Idiocy"
"The Man from A.U.N.T.I.E."
"Voyage to See What's On the Bottom" (Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea)
"Loused Up in Space" (Lost in Space)
I think there was also "The Sound of Money".

And my all-time favorite parody of pro sports:
"43-man Squamish"


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Ebor Fiddler
Date: 20 Nov 15 - 08:42 AM

I remember fondly the non-parody of The Wreck of the Hesperus, with fiendishly comical illustrations, such as "billows NOT pillows!" The rest is best left to the imagination.


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Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: clueless don
Date: 19 Nov 15 - 08:38 AM

I've lost track of whether this has been mentioned before, but Mad did a take-off on West Side Story, called "East Side Story" - it was about the United Nations (whose headquarters are on New York's East side?)

One song (to the tune of "There's a Place for Us") was sung by Chairman Mao, asking to be admitted to the UN. One verse went something like

Please be sweet to us
and give a seat to us.
Let us in and such joy you'll get
like we gave
Tibet.

Don


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