mudcat.org: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-Apr 29, 2011
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Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-Apr 29, 2011

Suffet 07 Jul 08 - 04:12 PM
M.Ted 07 Jul 08 - 04:06 PM
M.Ted 07 Jul 08 - 03:52 PM
Roger in Baltimore 07 Jul 08 - 03:05 PM
mouldy 07 Jul 08 - 02:47 PM
jacqui.c 07 Jul 08 - 02:31 PM
Rabbi-Sol 07 Jul 08 - 02:18 PM
Little Hawk 07 Jul 08 - 01:59 PM
georgeward 07 Jul 08 - 01:53 PM
WFDU - Ron Olesko 07 Jul 08 - 01:45 PM
Sue the Borderer 07 Jul 08 - 01:34 PM
Bobert 07 Jul 08 - 12:29 PM
Dave the Gnome 07 Jul 08 - 12:18 PM
katlaughing 07 Jul 08 - 11:59 AM
GUEST,leeneia 07 Jul 08 - 11:32 AM
catspaw49 07 Jul 08 - 11:25 AM
GUEST,Black Hawk on works PC 07 Jul 08 - 10:35 AM
scouse 07 Jul 08 - 10:11 AM
Bryn Pugh 07 Jul 08 - 10:11 AM
dwditty 07 Jul 08 - 10:10 AM
GUEST,lox 07 Jul 08 - 09:55 AM
kendall 07 Jul 08 - 08:47 AM
MMario 07 Jul 08 - 08:39 AM
Sandy Paton 07 Jul 08 - 01:36 AM
JedMarum 06 Jul 08 - 11:08 PM
Rustic Rebel 06 Jul 08 - 11:06 PM
frogprince 06 Jul 08 - 10:51 PM
Celtaddict 06 Jul 08 - 10:36 PM
Escapee 06 Jul 08 - 10:26 PM
artbrooks 06 Jul 08 - 10:15 PM
harpgirl 06 Jul 08 - 09:34 PM
Ken Schatz 06 Jul 08 - 09:31 PM
TRUBRIT 06 Jul 08 - 09:08 PM
topical tom 06 Jul 08 - 07:24 PM
GUEST,To Help Mend A Broken Heart 06 Jul 08 - 07:14 PM
Sorcha 06 Jul 08 - 06:49 PM
van lingle 06 Jul 08 - 06:42 PM
GUEST,Jon 06 Jul 08 - 06:38 PM
Pistachio 06 Jul 08 - 05:54 PM
Barry Finn 06 Jul 08 - 05:42 PM
bassen 06 Jul 08 - 05:36 PM
ranger1 06 Jul 08 - 05:32 PM
Cool Beans 06 Jul 08 - 04:59 PM
Barbara 06 Jul 08 - 03:54 PM
Bat Goddess 06 Jul 08 - 03:44 PM
maire-aine 06 Jul 08 - 03:43 PM
Murray MacLeod 06 Jul 08 - 03:38 PM
Ferrara 06 Jul 08 - 03:35 PM
GUEST 06 Jul 08 - 03:24 PM
GUEST,Jack the Sailor 06 Jul 08 - 02:32 PM
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/8
From: Suffet
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 04:12 PM

Mick,

I can't think of anything to say that hasn't already been said, except that are a lot of us who love you. You need to be strong for your daughter, and we all know you will be. Let the rest of us try to be strong for you.

--- Steve


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/
From: M.Ted
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 04:06 PM

I'm not sure if Mick or others are confortable with this...

MTed, I've removed the link to protect the privacy of the families, as it gave full names and townships. If anyone wants to know more, they can PM me. Thanks for your understanding.
kat a joe clone


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: M.Ted
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 03:52 PM

I read this last night, and couldn't bring myself to post anything. Like Art, and others, I've cried a few times--but I haven't come any closer to finding anything meaningful to say.

I've spent a lot of time in Western Michigan, near where you are. I've driven a lot of those same roads, and have lost friends and loved ones there, in this same way. This brings it all back to me. We find ways to move on, and we do. The pain lessens over time, but we never forget the ones we've lost. After even more time, that memory becomes a blessing.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/8
From: Roger in Baltimore
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 03:05 PM

Big Mick,

It must be hard to be the support for your daughter while you are in pain. Keep tied into your support systems, including the Mudcat, and if necessary develop some new support. May you find some peaceful time within this terrible disruption. I worry about my own grown sons and sincerely wish that they live long after I am gone. I can only know you are hurting and I wish you well.

Roger in Baltimore


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/
From: mouldy
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 02:47 PM

So. so sorry, Mick, and also for catching this thread a little late.

This has been a most dreadful shock for you all, and I can really offer no more than my prayers. Your beautiful daughter is lucky to have you there for her, and I'm sure you will be able to help each other, long after the physical damage has healed.

(((hugs)))

Andrea


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/
From: jacqui.c
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 02:31 PM

Thanks for the update Spaw - it is much appreciated.

Mick - I'm keeping all of you in my thoughts right now.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/8
From: Rabbi-Sol
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 02:18 PM

Mick my Friend,

               I can truly empathize with what you must be going through at this moment. Having met both, you and your wonderful daughter, Ciara, personally 3 years ago at Jean Ritchie's singing party only makes the tragedy that more meaningful.

It was exactly 38 years ago that I went through a similar experience.
I was leading a tour of summer camp children to the Amish Country when our chartered coach skidded in a rainstorm, crashed through the guardrail, and went down a 50 foot embankment near Allentown, Pennsylvania. Seven innocent children lost their lives that day and another 40 were seriously injured. I was thrown through the windshield and spent 2 weeks in the hospital with a fractured pelvis and other assorted injuries.

The physical injuries have long since healed but the mental scars remain to this very day. I still get terrible nightmares and after all these years still see a phsychologist for counseling once a week.

My advice to you is to get the best possible therapist for Ciara. It should be an experienced Psychlogist with a proven track record in dealing with post traumatic syndrome. Your standard school or hospital therapist will not be up to this job. I speak from first hand experience.

SOL


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/8
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 01:59 PM

The toughest thing of all is to lose a child...whether it be your own child or another's child whom you know well. We all go sometime, but no one wants to see a life ended at so young an age. Hold on tight to what you still have, Mick, in the hearts of the loved ones who are around you and alive in your own heart. Something very valuable has been lost here, but not all has been lost. You have my thoughts and prayers across the distance.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/
From: georgeward
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 01:53 PM

Mick,

Just saw this. I can't find words either. Just know I'm one more in a devoted group who will do whatever we can.

- George


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/8
From: WFDU - Ron Olesko
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 01:45 PM

Mick, none of us can really put ourselves in your position and understand the emotions you are going through, but hopefully you can find some degree of comfort in the knowledge that so many of your friends at Mudcat are thinking of you and sending good thoughts and prayers to you and your family in this extremely difficult time. It is a situation that no one wants to be in, but from what I've gathered about you from your posts on Mudcat, you seem to be a strong individual that can keep perspective and get through this.   

You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/8
From: Sue the Borderer
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 01:34 PM

((((((((((More virtual hugs - this time from Devon, England))))))))))

I hope that the loving support from the Mudcat Community helps cushion you all during what I imagine will be a very lengthy emotional roller-coaster ride.

And, katlaughing, thank you. It does indeed help to know Terra's name.

Sue


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/8
From: Bobert
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 12:29 PM

(((more prayers and healing thoughts)))


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/8
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 12:18 PM

I haven't posted before because I could think of nothing to say to my good friend Mick on this nightmare scenario. I am sure Mick would not mind my usage of the word friend for, even though we have never met, we have shared many things via this ol' cat box. All I can say now is that I am here, along with all his other friends, to offer any support and help, practical or otherwise, that I can.

All the good thoughts I can muster are heading in a westerly direction in the sincere hope that they may help, even if only in a tiny way, both families involved.

Dave.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/8
From: katlaughing
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 11:59 AM

Thank you, Spawdarlin'.

For those who might want to know, Ciara's friend's first name was "Terra." I find it helps to have a name to think on when sending thoughts and prayers.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick SeeSpawUpdate-7/8
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 11:32 AM

Thank you, Spaw, for that beautiful post. What a good friend you are!

Mick, I will remember your family in my prayers.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: catspaw49
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 11:25 AM

I had a short conversation with Mick yesterday.......just checking in and trying to show support. He's a strong man with great spirit but to say he is low right now is understatement. He knows as we all do what a life altering thing this is and how hard it will be to move on.

He has contacted support people within the hospital for help in dealing with it all. The beauty of Mick is that he knows they need that help and is not "toughing it out alone" as many often do. I see Harpy's list and I'm sure he will. I also offered sister Connie who has done tons of work in grief counseling. Its still early on and very hard for him to do much except to work through moment to moment (my take anyway).

Ciara has a lacerated liver and lacerated spleen which the MD's feel will heal as well as a concussion and assorted bruising.

As I read this thread I once again wish we were a true geographical community to be together physically at times like these. I know many of you feel the same. I am also struck at how difficult it is for so many generally "wordy" people to find anything to say. I know I can't..................

Keep sending the best you have. I am sure all those thoughts and prayers have helped me in the past......maybe even the reason I'm still here. I know Mick and all the families involved will need whatever we can do.

Pat


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: GUEST,Black Hawk on works PC
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 10:35 AM

Mick
I only know you thru mudcat but I share your pain.
No-one should have to face this.
Life sucks sometimes.
My thoughts are with you & healing vibes to your daughter [[*]]


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: scouse
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 10:11 AM

Love and good thoughts to you Mick and to your Family.
As Aye,
Phil


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 10:11 AM

Oh, Mick - love and condolences from us two.

May the Great Mother and the All Father comfort you and heal you.

You, and they, are in our prayers, pagan though these be.

So mote it be.

Erica and Bryn


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: dwditty
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 10:10 AM

Mick,

Sending light and love and prayers to all of you. All of us feel your pain, especially those of us who have been through similar situations...but this one is yours. As much as you are hurting, both this girl's family and your own are very lucky to have you during this sad time.

dw


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: GUEST,lox
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 09:55 AM

Trust yourself to work it out bro!


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: kendall
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 08:47 AM

Get your dear child to a good therapist, and, for you, ask the Great Spirit for the strength to get you over this horrible tragedy.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: MMario
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 08:39 AM

What words can I add to those that have been said? Only that my thoughts, prayers and love are with you and both families.

MMario


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Sandy Paton
Date: 07 Jul 08 - 01:36 AM

Mick, we are sending all our love. Take it, dear friend, and share it with those around you who need it most. We only wish we could do more.
    Sandy and Caroline


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: JedMarum
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 11:08 PM

My prayers are with you, Ciara and your wife. It is such a tragic story, and sadly one that plays all too often in our world. Sometimes the random nature of our world changes our lives in an instant, sometimes with our help and sometimes without. I wish you the very best in helping your daughter come to terms with this tragedy.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 11:06 PM

Mick, My sympathy to you and your families. Hope you all find some peace. Sue


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: frogprince
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 10:51 PM

My wife Judy happened to come down to look over my shoulder just as I found this. Our thoughts and prayers will be with your family, and the family of your young friend.   
                                     Dean


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Celtaddict
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 10:36 PM

My dear friend Mick,
(Yes, I know we only met 'in person' one Getaway)
My heart is broken with yours. Story in PM.
I can only join the circle in wishing to surround you and yours with love and support in whatever way we can.
Janet


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Escapee
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 10:26 PM

Hang in there Mick. Prayers on the way.
Marty


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: artbrooks
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 10:15 PM

Oh shit, Mick - I'm off line for a couple of days and come back to see this. I have no appropriate words


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: harpgirl
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 09:34 PM

I am so sorry, Mick. The way I know to help is to offer this link if Ciara needs to talk with someone soon:

Excellent social workers in your area


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Ken Schatz
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 09:31 PM

Mick, I am so sorry to hear that. Hope you are able to find some moments of peace through it all.   Sending you and your family lots of love and good thoughts.

Ken


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 09:08 PM

Mick -- I only know you a little but send you so much love and warmth -- it is truly a terrible thing that you are living through - much love and warmth to you.

TruBrit


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: topical tom
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 07:24 PM

I don't know you, Mick,but i am so sorry for you.We lost a son at age 27 so I feel some of what you must be going through now.There is really nothing I can say except that my thoughts and prayers are with you.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: GUEST,To Help Mend A Broken Heart
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 07:14 PM

I memorized this poem after my beautiful niece was murdered in the mid-1980s and the words offered solace to my grief and broken heart...

Author Unknown...

God's Lent Child

"I'll lend you for a little while
A child of mine," He said.
"For you to love the while he lives
And mourn when he is dead.
It may be six or seven years, or
Twenty two or three,
But will you 'til I call him back,
Take care of him for Me?

He'll bring his charms to gladden you,
And should his days be brief,
You'll have his lovely memories
As solace for your grief.
I cannot promise he will stay,
Since all from earth return,
But there are lessons taught down there
I want this child to learn.

I've looked this wide world over
In my search for teachers true,
And from the throngs that crowd life's lane,
I have selected you.
Now will you give all your love,
Nor think the labor vain,
Nor hate Me when I come to call
To take him back again?"

I fancy that I heard them say,
"Dear Lord, Thy will be done.
For all the joy this child shall bring,
The risk of grief we'll run;
We'll shelter him with tenderness,
We'll love him while we may,
And for the happiness we've known
Forever grateful stay.

But should the angels call for him,
Much sooner then we've planned,
We'll brave the bitter grief that comes
And try to understand."


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Sorcha
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 06:49 PM

Oh Mick......tears in Wyoming for all of you.....and hugs.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((All of you ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: van lingle
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 06:42 PM

Mick,

My thoughts are with you and your daughter and with both families. Hang in there.

Dave


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: GUEST,Jon
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 06:38 PM

I'm sorry, Mick


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Pistachio
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 05:54 PM

((((((((((((((((((((((Joining the virtual hug.))))))))))))))))))))
Your pain is shared.
I offer my condolences, and thank you for sharing your tragic news so that we might remember and recognise that all life and all our lives are truly special.

((((((((((((((((((((((Hugs from East Yorkshire))))))))))))))))))))

Hazel.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Barry Finn
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 05:42 PM

I'm so sorry for your daughter & her loss & how she must be feeling. I hope she can get past this awful tragedy. As a parent my worst nighmare is one of my kids someday won't come home, I can't imagine how her friends folks feel, hopefully someday you & your daughter might be of some comfort to them. I know what kind of man & father you are & I know that if I were her I'd be needing that big shoulder you're so ready to give to those in need, she'll be needing it for a long time to come, take her under your wing. I have a close friend & a cousin that were in the same situation, you'll need to watch & listen to her closely, let her lead you to where she has to go & I wish you all the luck in the world.
Take good care & all my best

Barry


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: bassen
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 05:36 PM

Gud være med deg og dine.

Praying for you all tonight. And giving my sons an extra hug.


John Svendsen


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: ranger1
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 05:32 PM

Oh, Mick, my friend...I'm so sorry to hear this. Hugs to you and to Ciara ans Mary Lou.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Cool Beans
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 04:59 PM

I'm so sorry, Mick. You're right: they're all our kids. Some you can help, some you can't. Hug 'em all you can.
Marty


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Barbara
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 03:54 PM

Ah, Mick, I am holding you all in the light. Do what the many catters above said about counseling, because there is much anger and grief and pain in everyone involved, and that you all must learn to live with, accept and forgive, and somehow go on. Know that we love you all. Keep breathing.
Love,
Blessings,
Barbara


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 03:44 PM

Dear Mick,

These two wordsmiths have no words...
but you know you and yours are held close in our hearts and thoughts.

Linn (Tom, too, of course)


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: maire-aine
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 03:43 PM

Oh, Mick, I am so sorry to hear this. Please know that we all love your and your family, and all the positive energy we can generate is on its way to you. Several folks have already mentioned counselling--yes, absolutely, for all of you. And be gentle with yourself too. You are a sweet, kind soul and all the good things you've done will come back to you. Open yourself to receive that good will.

Love,
Maryanne


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Murray MacLeod
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 03:38 PM

So sorry to read about this tragic event, Mick.

Never having suffered such a deprivation, I can only imagine the torment that both families must be going through.

I hope and pray that time will heal the pain to some degree.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: Ferrara
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 03:35 PM

Oh Mick, it is indeed heart breaking. I'm sending you a PM with some thoughts, and sending all of you my love.


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: GUEST
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 03:24 PM

*hugs* and deepest sympathies to all.

-- Gary


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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken - Mick
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 06 Jul 08 - 02:32 PM

I just read this thread for the first time.

Such a horrific event. I can't think of any words of comfort.

I will pray for you and your family, and your daughter and your daughter's lost friend, and her friend's family.


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