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Rapparee 26 Jul 07 - 12:13 PM
autolycus 26 Jul 07 - 05:06 PM
beardedbruce 26 Jul 07 - 05:09 PM
Severn 26 Jul 07 - 06:06 PM
Rapparee 26 Jul 07 - 06:43 PM
Stephen L. Rich 26 Jul 07 - 11:36 PM
Stephen L. Rich 26 Jul 07 - 11:44 PM
Georgiansilver 27 Jul 07 - 03:27 AM
TheSnail 27 Jul 07 - 05:54 AM
autolycus 27 Jul 07 - 05:55 AM
TheSnail 27 Jul 07 - 07:18 AM
beardedbruce 27 Jul 07 - 07:33 AM
Georgiansilver 27 Jul 07 - 08:43 AM
Rapparee 27 Jul 07 - 09:21 AM
TheSnail 27 Jul 07 - 09:39 AM
beardedbruce 27 Jul 07 - 10:32 AM
beardedbruce 27 Jul 07 - 10:33 AM
Rapparee 27 Jul 07 - 01:15 PM
GUEST,Unflavored 27 Jul 07 - 03:18 PM
gnu 27 Jul 07 - 03:52 PM
Stephen L. Rich 27 Jul 07 - 04:39 PM
Severn 27 Jul 07 - 05:35 PM
Stephen L. Rich 27 Jul 07 - 11:28 PM
Severn 28 Jul 07 - 04:50 AM
gnu 28 Jul 07 - 06:55 AM
Georgiansilver 28 Jul 07 - 07:13 AM
GUEST,beardedbruce 28 Jul 07 - 07:51 AM
Georgiansilver 28 Jul 07 - 10:28 AM
HouseCat 28 Jul 07 - 10:36 AM
Rapparee 28 Jul 07 - 11:03 AM
HouseCat 28 Jul 07 - 11:10 AM
John Hardly 28 Jul 07 - 11:17 AM
gnu 28 Jul 07 - 11:19 AM
HouseCat 28 Jul 07 - 11:22 AM
John Hardly 28 Jul 07 - 11:26 AM
Georgiansilver 28 Jul 07 - 11:51 AM
HouseCat 28 Jul 07 - 11:54 AM
Georgiansilver 28 Jul 07 - 11:56 AM
Stephen L. Rich 28 Jul 07 - 03:59 PM
Severn 28 Jul 07 - 04:26 PM
John Hardly 28 Jul 07 - 04:28 PM
gnu 28 Jul 07 - 05:24 PM
Georgiansilver 28 Jul 07 - 05:34 PM
Rapparee 28 Jul 07 - 10:25 PM
Georgiansilver 29 Jul 07 - 04:20 AM
Severn 29 Jul 07 - 08:35 AM
Georgiansilver 29 Jul 07 - 10:59 AM
JennyO 29 Jul 07 - 12:16 PM
Severn 29 Jul 07 - 12:22 PM
Severn 29 Jul 07 - 12:29 PM
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Subject: RE: .
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jul 07 - 12:13 PM

Keep on truckin' Momma
Truckin' 'til the break of day....


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Subject: RE: .
From: autolycus
Date: 26 Jul 07 - 05:06 PM

Have you noticed when reading the dictionary how difficult it is to follow the plot?



Still, they do explain evrey word.

So that's all right.




    Ivor


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Subject: RE: .
From: beardedbruce
Date: 26 Jul 07 - 05:09 PM

evrey - "AltaVista found 148,000 results "


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Subject: RE: .
From: Severn
Date: 26 Jul 07 - 06:06 PM

Ahhhhh!

A dose of Fats Waller in one fat swaller.

He always sounded like he was singing it with a different part of the oral tradition in mind than did The Android Sisters.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jul 07 - 06:43 PM

Look! It's the pionic man!


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Subject: RE: .
From: Stephen L. Rich
Date: 26 Jul 07 - 11:36 PM

beardedbruce, "Since you can't prove a negative, how do you know when you have a vacuum?"

Simple. Plug it in. Turn it on. If it sucks yu can hoover all day!

Stephen Lee


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Subject: RE: .
From: Stephen L. Rich
Date: 26 Jul 07 - 11:44 PM

Don't
By Stephen Lee Rich

Don't stick a carrot up your nose
Don't stick a carrot up your nose
Don't stick a carrot up your nose,
Because, carrots don't like that.

Don't teach a buffalo to fly
Don't teach a buffalo to fly
Don't teach a buffalo to fly
Without accident insurance.

Don't drive your car up on the roof
Don't drive your car up on the roof
Don't drive your car up on the roof
It will ruin your suspension.

Bridge:
Don't fill a camel's hump with beer.
Don't force a rabbit to be brave.
Don't build snowmen in Hawaii.
Don't use your elbows to shave.

Don't try to eat a wooden chair
Don't try to eat a wooden chair
Don't try to eat a wooden chair
Without a lot of mustard.

Bridge 2:
Don't fill a camel's hump with beer.
Don't hang you laundry in mid-air.
Don't plant a cactus in Alaska.
Don't leave a rake in your hair.

Don't stick a carrot up your nose
Don't stick a carrot up your nose
Don't stick a carrot up your nose,
Because, carrots don't like that.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 03:27 AM

Aw are we doing comedy songs then? Here's my rewrite of The Sally Gardens (The Sadly Gardens)

It was down by the Sadly Gardens, my love and I did meet,
As she crossed the Sadly Gardens, with bad breath- and smelly feet.
The odour was so ran--cid, I could smell her from the pa--rk bench,
Her best friend never told her, she had such an awful stench.

In a field down by the river, my fat love raised her arms,
Three inches of hair in her armpits, did not add to her charms.
Tattoos all over her body, made her look much worse than weird,
And the warts on her nose and earlobes, drew my eyes from off her beard.

It was down by the Sadly Gardens, my love and I did meet,
As she crossed the Sadly Gardens, with bad breath- and smelly feet.
I would not want any another, so no oth--er wi-ll I find,
She is hairy and smelly and ugly, but we all know love is blind.

Version by Mike Hill Nov 2006

Such a sweet sounding song...Best wishes, Mike.


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Subject: RE: .
From: TheSnail
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 05:54 AM

Hey! This thread is getting interesting.

Stop it immediately.


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Subject: RE: .
From: autolycus
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 05:55 AM

Home, home on the range,

   Where the deer ans the antelope play,

   And never is heard,

   A discouraging word,

   'Cos what can an antelope saaaaaaaayy?





      Ivor


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Subject: RE: .
From: TheSnail
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 07:18 AM

Home, home and deranged.
They've let me out for the day.
I'm free from my cell.
The straightjacket as well.
Now I must see who I can slay.


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Subject: RE: .
From: beardedbruce
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 07:33 AM

I learned it as:

Home, home on the range,
Where the beer and the cantelope play,
And never is heard,
A discouraging word,
'Cos what can a cantelope say?
But squish!


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Subject: RE: .
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 08:43 AM

Home home on the range,
Where the mudcat writers are strange,
They can thrill every Nation,
With their imagination,
But there are some who think they're deranged.

Actually that's a Limerick...aw well!


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Subject: RE: .
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 09:21 AM

Too, too interesting. Let's restore some balance here!

For an atom or molecule in which two transitions are driven by laser beams, a three-state model is used. Transitions among the three states are caused only by the oscillating electric fields of the laser beams. The amplitudes and detunings of the two laser beams, which are various functions of the time, appear in the Schrödinger equation for the atom or molecule. In certain cases, the Schrödinger equation can be solved analytically, to find transition probabilities and the probability of no transition. This is done by using Clausen's special function, or by assuming that the sum of the two detunings is zero at all times. Conditions for complete transfer of the population from the ground state to an excited state are obtained from the analytic solutions.


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Subject: RE: .
From: TheSnail
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 09:39 AM

But can Schrödinger's cat foresee death?


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Subject: RE: .
From: beardedbruce
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 10:32 AM

Post 666 !!!


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Subject: RE: .
From: beardedbruce
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 10:33 AM

When you care enough to send the hairy beast.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 01:15 PM

Slouching towards Bethlehem to be born.


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Subject: RE: .
From: GUEST,Unflavored
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 03:18 PM

I'm sending out to Michael Vick's for Chinese. Anyone else want to put in an order?


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Subject: RE: .
From: gnu
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 03:52 PM

Well, a Pina Colada, of course. Owwwooooooo.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Stephen L. Rich
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 04:39 PM

More beer, here!

Stephen Lee


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Subject: RE: .
From: Severn
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 05:35 PM

Wrong Old Vic you're keeping Company with, gnu. Or do we have Traders in our midst? If so, then Michael may be on the block.

Someone else can throw in a Vapo Rub reference. I'm too tired.....


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Subject: RE: .
From: Stephen L. Rich
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 11:28 PM

Have you been rubbing Vapo again? You know how she hates that!

Stephen Lee


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Subject: RE: .
From: Severn
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 04:50 AM

Are you kidding, Steven? The little vixen LOVES her Vick's fix to cure the Sicks!


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Subject: RE: .
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 06:55 AM

Severn, my dear man. That would have made sense. Tsk. Tsk.

Anyway, I really don't think he'll last. I mean, if you scramble on most downs, you are gonna get hit a lot of them. Eventually, he's gonna get Bledsoed. Kung powed?


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Subject: RE: .
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 07:13 AM

The gym. sauna and steamroom were good today!


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Subject: RE: .
From: GUEST,beardedbruce
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 07:51 AM

Then they should be rewarded!


What have you done for THEM lately?


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Subject: RE: .
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 10:28 AM

I gave myself to them in fine style....for a couple of hours.


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Subject: RE: .
From: HouseCat
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 10:36 AM

I kicked the door jamb in the dark last night getting up to go to the bathroom and I think I broke my pinkie toe.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 11:03 AM

You are supposed to kick OUT the jambs.


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Subject: RE: .
From: HouseCat
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 11:10 AM

Whatever I'm meant to do with it, my toe still hurts like the devil and has turned a lovely shade of aubergine.


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Subject: RE: .
From: John Hardly
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 11:17 AM

"...my toe still hurts like the devil and has turned a lovely shade of aubergine."

Probably like a Tasmanian Devil, the toe being, "down under" much like your lovely shade of aborigine. By the way, did you know you misspelled "aborigine"?


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Subject: RE: .
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 11:19 AM

Hardly John.


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Subject: RE: .
From: HouseCat
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 11:22 AM

Toe is sort of "down under" because I can't move it to straighten it out...ouch ouch ouch.


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Subject: RE: .
From: John Hardly
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 11:26 AM

"Hardly John."

Hardly, John

**********************************************************

Maybe you could make the toe more comfortable by putting some down under it. It might help put it back to its more aboriginal state.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 11:51 AM

What a great feat that would be!


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Subject: RE: .
From: HouseCat
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 11:54 AM

Grrrrrrrroan, GS and JH. On that note, I'm hobbling out to the garage sales.:~)


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Subject: RE: .
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 11:56 AM

O.K Hop-it mate....


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Subject: RE: .
From: Stephen L. Rich
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 03:59 PM

hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, JUMP, hop.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Severn
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 04:26 PM

"Ya-a-ard Sales, in the Sunset!......"

Don't get Maine Toe Poisioning while you're out, House Cat! And remember, whatever you do, you'll always land on your feet, so be extra careful. You can hobble, but you can't hide!.....

Is the door jamb all right? How 'bout the toe jam?


And don't call the ambulance--Call the Toe Truck!

--------------------------------------------------------------

Georgiansilver,

Did the reward amount to a "token of your S-steam"?

-----------------------------------------------------------------

gnu,

"Bledsoed"? Is that like when Drew "bledsoe" internally and went through "withdrewals"?.


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Subject: RE: .
From: John Hardly
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 04:28 PM

No need for a toe truck. Just get a bag of Fritos. It's cheaper.


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Subject: RE: .
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 05:24 PM

Severn, yes. But since it made no sense to most Cats, I beleive there was no real contribution to the thread. Insert emoticon here.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 05:34 PM

Severn....yes thanks to the provision of water by the Severn-Trent Water folk.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 10:25 PM

I'm assuming that Severn plays an instrument, and that's where the Severn meets the C.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 29 Jul 07 - 04:20 AM

Yes and not a Low C at the moment! Or river for that matter!


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Subject: RE: .
From: Severn
Date: 29 Jul 07 - 08:35 AM

I play no instruments. I sing a bit, accapella.

Right now, I live accapella. The worst parts of that life can be too meaningless even for this thread. The best parts are way above and beyond it. You get some of the back roads, alleys and fringes of the middle to lower middle grounds in here. I hope I haven't disobeyed any "No Dumping" signs.

In fact, I'll tell the arresting officer that I thought the sign said, "Fine For Dumping", so I did. And will continue to do.

And I hope any Severn overflowings that might cause any damage never come from me.

Not that it all means anything, or it wouldn't be here. If it ever starts to, Joe can make any post an offer it can't refuse and send it to either Severn river bottom in cement shoes.

....But back to our regulary scheduled stuff.

I recently saw where some sort of institute for the study of Hpynotism in Silver Spring MD was having a open symposium. It would be interesting to be a fly on the wall for THAT one! It would have had the makings of a great Saturday Night Live sketch.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 29 Jul 07 - 10:59 AM

You do have to be careful how you read signs...In my youth I saw one saying "Wet Paint" and was arrested for doing so.


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Subject: RE: .
From: JennyO
Date: 29 Jul 07 - 12:16 PM

Similarly - "Falling rocks don't stop".

Yeah, I knew that.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Severn
Date: 29 Jul 07 - 12:22 PM

Back in the early 70's, when we'd drive past a roadsign that said "Signal Ahead", other longhair types in the car would inevitably lift up two fingers and say, "Peace, Brother!" Kinda got old after a while, but then, so did we....

A good old yellow-and-black American "Yield Ahead" road sign might look good posted on the Tower Of London, though.

My favorite that was actually there on purpose was a sign that said "Slow Children Playing" in front of a school for retarded youth.


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Subject: RE: .
From: Severn
Date: 29 Jul 07 - 12:29 PM

Praise
The Lord! Have I reached the 700 Club?


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