Mudcat Café message #534672 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #38108   Message #534672
Posted By: Amos
24-Aug-01 - 04:04 PM
Thread Name: BS: Child of the System.....Ramblings
Subject: RE: BS: Child of the System.....Ramblings
It is curious, is it not, that we have high bars one must leap over to take charge of a home that could not or would not keep it. There are more forms than the IRS has involved sometimes, and judgements about your "suitability" to be responsible for raising a child are strict and stressful.

The adoption agents never touch your right to go screw and start another chain of life, of course, even if the verdict is you are wholly unfot mentally, emotionally, financially to raise a child born by others. And some of them others would never pass the criteria, meaning they would never get the legal right to adopt their own child, because in many cases they would be deemed incompetent and a risk.

So we believe somewhere that we CAN calculate fitness well enough to seriously increase the probability of at least the minimum standard of well-being for the child. We just aren't willing to do it for biological reproducers, and for good reason.

If anything about individual life is actually sacred, in human adults, the freedom to reproduce must be included, in spite of the tragic abuses, because for beings running a show in meat, as ours is, reproducing is the only long-term way to win. Tis doesn't bother enlightened people very much, but it gets a helluva lot more important, if less rational, the more an individual thinks he might not make a very good showing of things this lifetime and might be snuffed or die nameless and without money. The point is it is very much a part of life, and of the pursuit of happiness.

But ONCE ITS DONE, the justice of societal process should be quick and the education of the child's rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, however they get listed out, should be part of checking out of a maternity ward/

"Before you take Alphonse home with you, Mrs. Dummenpathetic, we need to ask you a few questions about the materials we gave you this morning. If you don't pass this simple quiz, Alphonse will stay with us while you go through a brief counseling course. We'll take real good care of him so you can concentrate on learniong this information so you can be sure you are confortable with being a mother....". A rapid fire checkout on principles of decency for childraisers. No pass, no baby, no matter how fine you think your DNA is.

Part of the problem is that even the wildest drugged out baby-stomper is capable of taking a shower, cleaning up, and presenting himsef as a fine, hardworking loving parent, even if he is dressed in his only clean jeans and you can see a snake-and-naked-lady tatoo just under the sleeve of his tee shirt. The worst slimeballs are often the best and putting on the shine for any brush with organizations where you need a little polish to relate and get through procedures. Smile an nod and don't crack the deck of Luckies til you get outside. By the time you get back to the low-rent mobile home, its back to the normal hate, anger, authoritarian command, and whip 'em if they can't take a joke. Lizard-apes dressed up in men's clothing. How do you know what the real signs are?

It is also a tough issue from another angle -- social justice on behalf of children has to take its evidence from those who are not mature, and are a little short in vocabulary. I have known too instances of terrifying legal entanglementsbeing imposed on parents who were not abusing their child but who were accused of it, in one case it was a completely false tasle dreamed up by a neighbor child, reminiscent of the Puritan drama "The Crucible". In another case it was a really dumb sibling. The one who had been falsely accused by the neighbor's child did several years of hard time for something he did not do, and was sane enough to come out with many lessons learned, and a really dramatic improvement in his artistic talents, since he focused on them, but I do not think his life will be the better for having had to learn how to deal with prison life.

And yet I am glad even in these cases that someone stepped in. The hardest thing about Spaw's story is that the social case workers could not intercede. So I guess both sides of the sword need sharpening -- more sensitive triggers for intervention, AND more accurate methods of ensuring just measures only. Because it ruins people to have their family broken up by mistake as much as it ruins them when they are breaking up familymembers' faces and minds through crazed abuse...