Mudcat Café message #515563 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #37057   Message #515563
Posted By: Amos
26-Jul-01 - 11:07 PM
Thread Name: Suspect Physical Abuse--What to do?
Subject: RE: Suspect Physical Abuse--What to do?
I don't know enough to speak with authority, but from those I have met in such straits, the problem is that they are blinded by some kind of overwhelming connection to the abuser. It may be emotional overwhelm, or some kind of special sensation which the victim believes she depends on, such that it makes all the punishment worth bearing. The problem is like a fanatacism or a cult-like obsession, except that it is a personal one-to-one blindness instead of a group.

Unless and until there is some kind of communication breakthrough, no alternative will be real enough to even consider. But for that to happen there has to be enough necessity to shift things a little, whether it comes from an accepted friend or because the instinct for survival finally rears up and asserts itself.

My effort would be to take her to lunch from work and try to cut through to the the simple reality that she is at risk of losing her life. Whoever she most trusts or could be brought to would have to take on the mission and give it every shot.

Failing that it's a call to the police department and social services. Hard to say on what evidence they would be willing to intercede.