CaitI think you've hit the nail on the head. It is about understanding but before then there has to be a willingness to understand. If she has closed her mind and will only listen to what is acceptable to her, she will never challenge her perceptions and never change her mind about anything.
It's all to easy for her to go through life like that and try and surround herself with likeminded people (or even introduce new people and try to make them become likeminded)- but that is how prejudice is perpetuated.
Keeping singing your songs