Mudcat Café message #3463040 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #142631   Message #3463040
Posted By: billybob
08-Jan-13 - 06:26 AM
Thread Name: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
Dear Nigel and Ann

Good news to hear that Jane is back home, with a break from the chemotherapy I do hope she has a chance to build up her strength , lots of loving care from her wonderful family and some good home cooking must boost her up.

I am so pleased that you and Ann are going to be supported by Macmillan, they are a fantastic group of nurses who will take care of you as well as Jane and her family. In my experience they help in so many unexpected ways.When someone is very ill it is often the carers that go downhill and they need support and advice from someone who has no emotional involvement but provides a listening ear and sometimes a shoulder to cry on.

You may know that my lovely mum has Dementia, over the last year I have had an Admiral Nurse ( a trained mental health professional who is there for the carer not the patient) I can phone her at any time when things get rough and we meet often for coffee and I can be honest with her about my feelings of frustration, sometimes anger, and most importantly she understands how ones feels the loss of a loved one who is with you in body but certainly not in mind! I can honestly say that I would not have got through the last six months of looking after mum while my husband was having chemotherapy. She has solved what seemed to me, insurmountable problems with sensible simple solutions, organised someone to stay over night so Billy and I could have a weekend away. The most important advice on day one was" Wendy stop feeling guilty!!"

The bad news? I had a letter the day after Christmas telling me that the service of Admiral Nurses in N E Essex is stopping at the end of January because of funding cuts !I am devestated, not just for me, I have good support systems in place that allow me to employ carers so that I can continue to run my business and therefore have some respite from being with mum 24/7. But I am very aware that there are lots of other people who are housebound looking after a relative with Dementia and the Admiral Nurse is their only contact! So I am on a mission, letters to the powers that be that have made this decision, our local MP, number 10 and also a reporter on the Daily Telegraph who interviewed me in December about my brilliant Admiral Nurse and how she has helped me.

So Nigel, take all the support and help you can, you and Ann must be kind to yourselves,the Mudcat Rainbow Crew all send love and prayers everyday and somewhere in the world they are thinking of you every minute of the 24 hours!

Much love,
Wendy xxxxxxxxx