Mudcat Café message #2153955 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #41824   Message #2153955
Posted By: GUEST,FuBar
20-Sep-07 - 09:27 PM
Thread Name: Nasty Nursery Rhymes
Subject: RE: Nasty Nursery Rhymes
Mary had a little lamb
She also had a bear
I've often seen her little lamb
But I've never seen her bear (/bare)

Mary had a little blouse
'twas tatterd all to bits
And everywhere that Mary went
It showed her little tits!

Mary had a little skirt
'Twas split right up the front
And everywhere that Mary went
... She had to sit down all the time. (Yeah right.)

Mary's lamb had foot'n'mouth
Her father went and shot it
But Mary's dad had shagged the lamb
And now her mother's got it!

Mary had a little lamb
It's fleace was covered in lard
And every step that Mary took
She slipped back half a yard.

Old mother hubbard went to her cupboard to fetch her dog Rover a bone,
But when she bent over, Rover took over, and gave her a bone of his own.

Here's an 'Arkalah' song (spelling?) I remember from 'Scouts. Substitute 'Arkalah' with anyone you hate provided it's 3 sylables:

On top of old Smokey
All covered in mud,
There was Arkalah
All covered in blood;

A knife through her belly
An axe in her head,
(missing words here, possibly "it wasn't long before")
I knew she was dead;

I went to her funeral
I went to her grave,
Some people threw flowers
I lobbed a grenade!

And she went up, up, up
And then she came down, down, down
(more missing words, possibly "then she made a big hole")
Right in the ground.

I had a funny feeling
She wasn't quite dead...
So I got my Bazooka
And blew off her head!

I got more, but this post is long enough for now. I'll send more later, probably.