Mudcat Café message #1131900 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #67653   Message #1131900
Posted By: hobbitwoman
08-Mar-04 - 09:25 PM
Thread Name: BS: Dating Behaviour - am I out of touch ?
Subject: RE: BS: Dating Behaviour - am I out of touch ?
Well, B&B, you may be out of step with a lot of people's thinking, but I'm apparently the last person on earth who still views sex as something to be saved for marriage. Before y'all start throwing things at me, I do not sit in judgment on anyone - that is just my personal belief, maybe just a throwback to all that good, old-fashioned Irish Catholic guilt I was raised on... or maybe not. At any rate, that's one of the reasons I have not dated in the 13 years I have been widowed... I know guys generally want "more" than what I feel I can give, and I have no desire to be spending my evenings fending off, physically or verbally, someone's advances. Also, what kind of a relationship would it be if I felt I was denying my partner something that was important to him? If this all adds up to a vow of celibacy, so be it. I can't change the way I am either.

Now, this is not to say that if 6 months or a year or 10 years from now, the "right" person might come along, I might find myself thinking differently on this subject, because if there is one thing I have learned, it is that I cannot predict the future, and a lot of the things I used to believe, I don't believe any more. So maybe I can't change the way I am, but life can change me. And has done, and probably will again.

But as for jumping into bed after 2 dates, for all the good reasons others have listed here, no, sorry, don't see that happening any time soon. If that's what dating's all about these days, I'll skip it, thanks.