Mudcat Café message #1066436 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #64934   Message #1066436
Posted By: GUEST,Mato Nupai
05-Dec-03 - 08:00 PM
Thread Name: Obit: My Wife
Subject: RE: Obit: My Wife
The condolences offered here are heartfelt and each stands on its
own merit.

Aloha nui loa Stilly.

I don't recall saying or implying that condolences offered to David were not heartfelt or sincere.

I don't think we need annotations and corrections on those
empirical statements. There's no one right way to grieve.

I will agree with you on one fact "There is no one right way to grieve"

However; I will say there are bad ways to grieve, and better ways to grieve.

David is going through the assorted levels of grief in a good way. I know that some opinions were well intentioned; but those methods would depress David's mood instead of lifting his mood.

If David gets stuck and is not progressing through the levels or grief; then those techniques would be a good way to force him to move forward.

This is a recent traumatic event. I ask that you allow David the chance to progress through grief in an orderly manner instead of thinking he has to progress through grief on your timetable.

Heidi is getting the help she needs on the other side, and David has several friends around him to help any way they can.

Two Bears