Mudcat Café message #1059158 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #64659   Message #1059158
Posted By: Stilly River Sage
22-Nov-03 - 01:40 PM
Thread Name: BS: Nest - Empty or full?
Subject: RE: BS: Nest - Empty or full?
My children are still young enough that I expect to have them here for the next 8 or 10 years, depending on where they plan to go to college. Once they turn 18 the child support stops, and the only assistance I will be able to give them for their higher education is room and board, and hope that their father continues to give them the same amount as an allowance toward school that I received for support.

My daughter is 15 and my son is 11. I talked to them about the costs of renting and now of homeowning. I try to make them aware of how to go about keeping bills paid and costs down. I try to teach them about the pleasures of having your own space and at the same time being a helpful part of the team-effort that is this family. I'm on good terms with my ex, so the kids don't get the corrosive drip drip drip of vitreol I got from my mother following my parent's divorce and I think they will feel that they can choose where they want to live when they start college, whether with one of us or on their own.

To answer Leo's question, they are learning now how to live in this world and hopefully to pay their way without building up huge debts to hamstring themselves along the way. They will move out when they're ready, and I hope to keep our relationships such that they know they can move back if they need to but they have to help out around here.