Mudcat Café message #1042974 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #63952   Message #1042974
Posted By: Rich(bodhránai gan ciall)
27-Oct-03 - 10:41 PM
Thread Name: BS: Bereavement
Subject: RE: BS: Bereavement
As has been said before, get ready for one hell of a ride. There'll be the song on the radio, the joke that your departed loved one would have loved, the perfect Christmas gift in a store window, the old movie you used to like to watch together...a million reminders blindsiding you from every direction.. At first they'll be heart-wrenching kicks in the chest.

With time I've come to think of them as visits from my relations and friends. I love to be reminded of my mother, grandparents and old friends. But it takes time.

If it's any comfort, remember that the loss is yours, not your loved one's. No matter what faith you may believe in, they're in a better place.

Most importantly, feel the pain and grow through it. Accept that feelings are just that, feelings. They're not right or wrong, they just are. And there are hundreds of them; anger, guilt, abandonment, remorse, shock, disbelief, loss; last of all, acceptance. You must feel them as they come.

Lastly, PLEASE don't bury them under a stiff upper lip or in a bottle. It only prolongs the grieving process.

I'm terribly sorry for your loss and hope you find peace soon. You'll be in my prayers