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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
WyoWoman BS: Was I wrong to be offended at the howls? (38) RE: BS: Was I wrong to be offended at the howls? 09 Feb 02


Sounds like you were responding in an appropriate way to the actual message, rather than the "joke," which often is a way of expressing hostility or meanness without having to take reponsibility for one's own behavior. I'd be hurt and hurt usually transmutes into anger. I don't know whether your leaving the circle was "right," but I think it would be hard to remain, given the strong feelings this person prodded out of you. But that's the point of jokes of this sort, isn't it? THEY get to just hold up their hands and say,"Hey, buddy. Chill. It was just a joke," and make you seem like the hypersensitive crank. It's a very win-lose situation, and I don't know many effective ways to deal with that. It'd sure leave a bad taste in my mouth and I imagine I'd go out of my way to avoid this person and his/her cronies in the future. I mean, why didn't one of them have the decency/intelligence to say, "You know, I don't think this is such a great idea. I'm trying to listen ..."

Ick. Double ick.

ww




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