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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
Jim Dixon Lyr Req:Biggest Box in Town / Any Ice Today, Lady? (16) Lyr Add: ANY ICE TO-DAY, LADY? (Pat Ballard) 15 Mar 20

From the sheet music at York University:

ANY ICE TO-DAY, LADY? (A Collegiate Razz-Berry)
Words and music by Pat Ballard, ©1926.

1. Percival Damp was king of the campus,
And strictly "College"—
Never got pally, never would dally
With books of knowledge;
But when summer rolled around,
Percival had to labor.
In his town, he drove around,
Shouting to ev'ry neighbor:

CHORUS 1: Any ice today, lady?
It's nice today, lady?
How about a piece of ice today?
Oh, it's only a quarter!
You know that you oughter.
Hurry up before it melts away!
Not on your linoleAM?
Giddyap, NapoleAN!
Your Papa's a nice man,
And so's your old ice man.
Oh, lady, be good to me!

2. Percival wondered if he had blundered
When things got duller.
He'd have been there had only his hair
Had a diff'rent color.
So he bought a red toupée
Just to deliver ice in.
When he drove around he'd say
In a way most enticin':

CHORUS 2: Any ice today, lady?
It's nice today, lady?
How about a piece of ice today?
Tell me why you don't order
Some Eskimo water.
Though your credit's good, I wish you'd pay.
I'll give you a premiAM.
Not a red geraniAM!
I'm feelin' so silly,
I'll hand you a lily.
Oh, lady, be good to me!

- - - - -
The sheet music contains 4 more "extra choruses" but I don't find them interesting enough to type them out.

You can hear a recording of this song performed by Ernest Hare and Billy Jones (The Happiness Boys), on Regal (8116-B), from 1926, at The Internet Archive. As usual, they change the words rather freely, adding lots of "patter" and transforming the song into a dialog.

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