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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
el_punkoid_nouveau What started the war in Europe (68* d) RE: What started the war in Europe 19 Jun 07


Well now... let's see...

Basically, the relationship between Britain and France has been a state of war since, oh, about 1065 - when the Normans (being Vikings disguised as Frenchmen really) decided that they were bored of being French and wanted to be English. So they came over here in 1066, and decided to cheat in the ritual football match by a. pretending to run away and b. using arrows.

Of course, being Englishmen, and thus Top Dogs (if you don't believe me, try reading Sellars and Yeatman - 1066 and all that), we were none too pleased with this situation, and promptly decided that the best response was to knock 7 shades of brickdust out of France on any possible occasion.

And this we continued to do for some 850 years, every 50 years or so giving them a severe bashing generally with the assistance of the Germans - or at least, what were to become the Germans. This kept the French in their place, and gave rise to all sorts of wonderful inventions down the years, such as the British Empire.

Unfortunately, we allowed this to slip during the twentieth century, and on a couple of occasions, decided to take sides with France and play havoc with the Germans. Which was not a Good Thing to do, because it allowed the French to get uppity and actually think that they could win the important things in life - notably the Six Nations. Which, incidentally, ensures that war is continued in Europe, in much the same way as the Wars of the Roses are still fought at Headingley and Old Trafford on a regular basis.

epn


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